Audio Report #0768 (Not mine, but good)


Poster Extraordinaire
...this account is for anyone who unearths the research center, I've set the computer's audio system to record whenever I speak or make a sound. The hard drive has enough space for thirty-six hours of audio, that is all I should need. Since mission control does not answer, I can only surmise that they too have been compromised.

My name is Professor Roy Hinkley. I leave our data and this audio journal in the hope that it will somehow aid whomever finds this place... I am the only remaining member of our research contingent. There were twelve of us at the start. A gathering of forensic specialists, neurologists, biologists, chemists, toxicologists and a pair of military consultants... we also had twenty-five infected cadavers to work with.

I prefer the term "infected cadaver" to the appellation the media is using - zombie. It brings to mind cheap horror films and primitive superstition. If you take nothing else from my chronicle dear listener, know this -- this is a problem that can only be solved by science. Our assignment was to find some way to stop the walking undead before they swept humanity aside...
There were many early successes for our group. We determined the source of the infected cadaver outbreak was not the result of the wrath of a vengeful God, witchcraft, voodoo or something equally ludicrous. The source of the outbreak was radiation -- radiation carried on the back of a comet like rats carried plague-riddled vermin on their backs centuries ago.

The tragedy here is that we failed to realize the power of said radiation, the sheer scope of its reconstitutional abilities. Our procedures were as simple as they were methodical. At the beginning of every week, we would pull one of the infected cadavers from cold storage and begin a protracted series of tests. We analyzed everything from its hair to its basil ganglia and we were beginning to gain some understanding of how the radiation had animated previously lifeless tissue. I am utterly certain that if disaster had not befallen us we would have found a way to stop this nightmare in the beginning.

No wait. I have so little time and I still have not shared with you the intentions behind my audio record. You see, I was bitten by one of the infected cadavers and now the puzzling infection is going to run its course through me. There is no treatment but I hope that by chronicling my degeneration I may be able to aid science...

...I was bitten on the right hand, between the thumb and pointer finger. The bite was forceful enough to fracture the metacarpals. I've lost a good amount of skin and muscle tissue from the wound area. I've had it wrapped in bandages for some time now and I'm going to unwrap it now...

Fascinating. The bleeding has ceased but the area around the wound is darkening, almost like an abrasion on the surface of a piece of fruit. I briefly probed the area with a scalpel and found a spreading purulence. It resembles pus save that it has a reddish-black hue. It is thick with fibers that appear to be similar to some strains of thallophytic plant life. Is this how the infection will supplant my central nervous system? I wonder how it will affect the higher brain functions.

I wonder.

One of my fellow scientists, a garrulous little man named Wilkins, kept a cache of liquor in his rooms. I think I could use a drink... several drinks in fact...

...It appears that I will not be having that drink after all. I suppose this explains my lack of appetite as well. Mere moments after taking a sip from the bottle of rotgut Wilkins kept under his bed, I found myself wracked with nausea. At first, I attributed this loss of self-control to the low-quality swill I had foolishly imbibed, but as my retching metamorphosed into a bout of dry heaves I began to realize that something far more malignant was in effect... I made my way to the battlefield that had been our cafeteria and tried to see if I could consume a pair of crackers and a glass of water. If anything, the illness I felt at this was longer and more terrible. Just speaking about it makes me want to vomit all over again.

Much like rabies, it appears that the infection causes the sufferer's digestive system to reject all nourishment. I wonder if that is why the affected cadavers must feast upon living flesh...

...tried to sleep. Woke with a fever... 103 I think, it's hard to tell, my eyes are blurry. I kept dreaming of my loved ones, my wife, my parents, my...

Never mind. Such sentimental drivel doesn't exactly pertain to my thesis, does it?

To the point. Approximately nine hours after contracting the infection I find myself feverish. There is a slight ringing in my ears. I find myself ravenously hungry and the bruised area of my hand has now spread down the fingers and up to the head of the radius and the ulna. They look like dark threads working their way up their arm to my heart... My father died of a heart attack -- I wonder if this will feel similar... My hand occasionally clenches of its own volition. It's like watching a laboratory rat in its death throes...

...stupid really, we should have realized... we should have taken better precautions.

I pieced together what had happened by reviewing the security tapes. A medic and a neurologist were vivisecting one of the infected corpses. They had immobilized it by strapping it down to the table and then amputating its limbs and lower jaw. They removed, took samples from, and weighed the infected cadaver's organs. This was not simple sadism at work. We did this to see if the various nerve agents we were testing were having any effect at all. Besides, our main concern was testing and studying the infected cadavers' artificially stimulated nervous systems. Those excess tissues merely got in the way.

They threw the tissues into a container. After they were thoroughly and completely studied, the organs and the still struggling torso were taken to the incinerator and disposed of.

Those two scientists never got the chance to dispose of anything.
We should have guessed... I should have guessed that the neural matrix created by the alien radiation would not subscribe to the patterns of behavior used by Earthly life forms. This neural matrix was multi-tiered (dare I say holographic?) in nature. Unfettered by the powerful neurological impulses that ordinarily subsumed them, the discarded tissues somehow adapted themselves to operate on a fundamentally different level. Like the worm that when cut in half crawls in two separate directions.

And it looked something like a giant worm was attacking when the infected cadaver's small intestine looped itself around the throat of the neurologist and dragged him screaming into the fetid trash barrel.

The medic then made the mistake of fleeing the room, leaving the door open.

What happened next was like a butcher shop comedy. Somehow that infected cadaver, or should I say what remained of the infected cadaver, managed to free its monstrous kin from cold storage. Whether this was through dumb luck or an intelligence that had previously gone unnoticed, I can't say. By the time we realized what was going on we were being overrun...

...The ringing in my ears is getting louder, I can't stop sweating. The black lines stretch all the way to my chest. It feels like there's a fist in there slowly squeezing my lungs. My stomach is aching with hunger but everything I've tried to eat -- from ice cubes to raw hamburger -- will not stay down. At this rate I'll dehydrate before I succumb to the infection itself. Perhaps that's a mercy. If by some miracle Caroline Majors is still alive and a message can be gotten to her... tell her... tell her I was thinking of her...

...nuh... not want... nuh... can't... Jesus! ...don't want to die... not like this... not like this... nuh...

...It's a miracle, a miracle! No more fever, the discoloration on my hand is fading -- and I can move my hand. Not as good as I used to but still... Perhaps the human auto immune system does have a way to combat the infection. I must see if I can contact the government!

But first I'm going to record my vital statistics and take a blood sample. Any information I can. The cure could be in my white blood cells just waiting to be released...

...My breathing is nothing more than a reflex action. I let my exuberance get the better of me. It doesn't make any sense! Why am I still here? Why am I still talking...?

...The fever was bad, worse than I ever expected. It killed me. You hear me talking but I'm an infected cadaver now. The brain dies last, like a fish in a tank nobody cleans...

...Stabbed meself -- No! Myself! Stabbed myself in tummy, blood but no pain. I like that, no pain but still here, falling apart like -- falling apart -- I'm going to get one of the guns offa the military soldiers that died in the cafeteria. Shot to head always works... scientifically proven...

...soldier lying on back arms out like Jesus and Jesus say 'take of my body like bread' so I did it was cold and it filled my belly but then came out where the holes I made are. Maybe that's why I'm still hungry...

...God why? God why? God why?...

...thyey're huuuhhh... muhore soldiers... huhhhhh... suh-hoon... uhm stuh-ill in muh muhnd buh-ut uh can't stuh-op! suh huh-ungry... uh-all uh huh-ave luh-ft is thu huh-unger...


From All Flesh Must Be Eaten Tabletop Game
Can we get some Cliffs Notes on this post, or some sort of preface or summary?

It's a scientist who researched zombies, it's an account of it.
Man zombies rock! whats your zombie plan?

My plan is to build a fortress (I've got plans, I kinow I'm a nerd) somewhere in the Arctic Circle/Tundra. It has the capacity to hold 1,000 people, in the Resident center. It also has a hospital, an airstrip, a helicopter pad, a school (for teh childrenz), an army bunker, a cave retreat (it's on a mountain), and several acres of farmland within the compound (artificial farmland due to the cold weather outside).

Several animals will also be brought in (mainly domesticated (cows, pigs, chickens, dogs, cats, horses, etc.) but we may bring in some other animals to protect them from the zombie horrors since zombies don't discriminate.

It will be powered by wind and solar power, Arctic winds are strong enough to power the compound alone, but solar will just give us excess energy that we may need for expanding our walls.

I plan on sending out a radio signal strong enough to permeate any radio frequency saying where it is (I know there are bandits, but thats' why we have walls and armed forces, amirite?), which in time will allow several safety compounds to join in an attempt to rid the world of this zombie scum.