A friend and a foe

[CausalSpark]

I'm not sure how people will feel about this. If it is questioned as being considered spam or controversial in anyway, I humbly apologize. I'm trying to figure out a way to handle a situation that's been picking at my mind for awhile. There was this time where I knew a guy and we were good friends. One day, I decided that I only wanted to invite two people to my house, and I didn't invite him. I'm not sure if this was the reason for this dislikeness, but he started hating me. He always insulted me, a joke of course, but I didn't know whether he was joking or being serious.

I was being labeled with stereotypes, which I will not share. For some reason, I got ignored. My other friends would flock to him and leave me behind. They are still my friends to this day, and they don't understand this situation either. It seems like no one cares, and I don't want to force them to do anything that would make them lose their friendship with the guy who hates me. I wrote a message to him, expressing my concerns with complimenting detail, and he sent me one back, nearly illegible, but fairly hurtful and very immature.

The guy that was once a good guy has turned into an immature person with no motive to talk. My friends, the sheep, follow behind his will. I was wondering if anyone else had an experience with a friend that could have been avoided? How could I solve this situation or heck, how can I come to a resolve?

 

[ROCKET CHUMP]

although this has never really happened to me, i would say just move on. If he does actually seem to dislike you now, and hes being that immature about it, he must not be that good a friend anyways. of course people change, so i say move on and just leave him be. if he tries to further insult you, just ignore him, keeping in mind that hes the one who was immature and you are doing what you think is right.

well, that is what i would do. hope it helps.

 

[CausalSpark]

[quote1191987913=ROCKET CHUMP]
although this has never really happened to me, i would say just move on. If he does actually seem to dislike you now, and hes being that immature about it, he must not be that good a friend anyways. of course people change, so i say move on and just leave him be. if he tries to further insult you, just ignore him, keeping in mind that hes the one who was immature and you are doing what you think is right.

well, that is what i would do. hope it helps.
[/quote1191987913]

Well, the one thing that bothers me is that my friends know he is wrong, and yet they don't care and let everything go. I'm not bothered by him hating me, but rather bothered by the fact that my friends won't stick up for what they think is right instead of profusely apologizing to me. It's hard to talk to my friends.

 

[sTeWiE [JONES]]

Kick him right in the nuts!

 

[Dekline [JONES]]

Unfortunatley, your friends most likely have not been in the situation that your are in. So, although they say he was wrong, they will still go to him for some unknown reason. Ive been in a similar situation but reversed where someone who i thought was a friend made some remarks to me that I thought were offensive, having to do with my weight. Thankfully my true friends sided with me and the guy is no longer friends with any of us. I think your just going to have to confront the guy on the subject and try to talk it out rationally. If he still wants to be immature about the whole thing, then let him. But as for your friends going with him on the whole thing...mabey they are not as true of friends as you think they are.

 

[+LadyLuck+]

Friends can fight easily over a misunderstanding. The only way I know to overcome the situation is to pretty much "bite the bullet" (is that the right term). Confront your friend and just talk it out. Let him know that you value your friendship with him, and if he continues to be immature, it'll be his loss. As long as you tried, that's all you can do.

I have friends who pretty much severed friendships (and these are friendships that's lasted over 10 years) over assumptions and misunderstandings. And instead of talking about it, they let it dwell and their friendship becomes strained. Being one of that group of friends, I don't want to have to pick sides. I try to stay neutral and try to see both point of view. I'm just lucky that those couple of friends that are no longer friends don't try to make me choose.

I hope everything works out for you. Take care!

 

[Peregrin]

I had been in a similiar situation long time ago when i was a freshman in high school. I moved on and found out a couple years ago that he turned on another friend...People such as turncoats who are friends one day and become a nemises the next don't deserve your friendship.

 

[flavoracid]

The problem is that this guy isn't your friend. Do you really want to be his friend again or simply resolve the issue? And, if the others follow suit when insults are being hurled, then they aren't your friends either. Chances are that this guy really liked you, or looked up to you, and that previous issue caused his envy to turn to hate. Often enough people who choose a soul to pick on are either trying to hide their insecurities or are really trying to break the other person down because they want to be them.

and again, if the others don't understand and don't sympathize with you then who needs them. Friends come and go like the seasons, and clearly this guy isn't a true friend, and those come few and far between.

 

[flavoracid]

P.S. Causal, your name should be casual, you spelled it wrong. LMAO

 

[mister blonde]

[quote1192084164=flavoracid]
P.S. Causal, your name should be casual, you spelled it wrong. LMAO
[/quote1192084164]

It's supposed to be Causal...lol.

And I agree with Deckline, maybe your friends aren't so true after all if they keep siding with him.

 

[CausalSpark]

Thanks for the feedback, guys. I can't talk with the guy that doesn't like me, since he decides to ignore everything I say, so I'll just make a rant to my rant and I'll let them decide.

 

[CausalSpark]

My friends have no problem with me. They sided with me one time, and the guy that doesn't like me got paranoid. He thought that they liked me more than me and got really upset. That's probably the reason why they take his side.

 

[=(e)=contract killer]

[quote1192154274=ROCKET CHUMP]
although this has never really happened to me, i would say just move on. If he does actually seem to dislike you now, and hes being that immature about it, he must not be that good a friend anyways. of course people change, so i say move on and just leave him be. if he tries to further insult you, just ignore him, keeping in mind that hes the one who was immature and you are doing what you think is right.

well, that is what i would do. hope it helps.
[/quote1192154274]



Quoted for truth.

agree 100%

 

[CausalSpark]

[quote1192155723=flavoracid]
P.S. Causal, your name should be casual, you spelled it wrong. LMAO
[/quote1192155723]

By the way, I hope you're joking. In case you're not:

caus·al (kô'zəl)
adj.

1. Of, involving, or constituting a cause: a causal relationship between scarcity of goods and higher prices.
2. Indicative of or expressing a cause.