Article ITT I attempt to review every movie I've seen.

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Title: Event Horizon
Year: 1997
Country of Origin: UK/US
Director: Paul W. S. Anderson

Story: "Where We're Going, We Won't Need Eyes To See."

Review: This Anderson's best film, no it's not that great of a film, but Event Horizon is still his best film. The movie is a a basic horror in space/slasher film set up. A group of people are stuck on a ship with some really bad voodoo going down and they get killed off one by one. What helps Event Horizon stand up higher than your average slasher film is it's camp factor and the fact that it stars Laurence Fishburne and Sam Neill...who are both awesome. So if your a fan of camp then this one is definitely worth your time.

[7/10]
 
hey sexy beast, go ahead & review the one. gotta say that jet li did an ok job in his role as the bad guy in lethal weapon 4 (imo).
 
may have skipped it but. Mystery Science Theater 3000: the movie. And it sounds like Pandorum was slightly based off of Event horizon/
 
Death said:
may have skipped it but. Mystery Science Theater 3000: the movie. And it sounds like Pandorum was slightly based off of Event horizon/
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I saw the trailer for Pandorum and was like "oh, this sounds like Event Horizon" and then I saw that it was produced by Paul W.S Anderson and was like "Okay...what the hell?"

Then I finally saw it and was like "Man I really wish I was watching Event Horizon right now."


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Title: Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie
Year: 1996
Country of Origin: US
Director: Jim Mallon

Story: In the not too distant future...

Review: MST3k is, or should be, a staple of every movie fans repertoire. It's made by people who love the art form for people who either love comedy or love the art form. MST3K: The Movie is basically a like an episode of MST3K. So if you like MST3K then you'll like this movie.

[7/10]
 
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Title: Mission: Impossible
Year: 1996
Country of Origin: US
Director: Brian De Palma

Story: Betrayed, abandoned, and disavowed; MIF agent Ethan Hunt must uncover a serpentine plot to get the CIA off his back and to get vengeance for the lose of his team.

Review: I actually liked this movie, I know there is a rather large contingent who hated this one...but I found it to be pretty entertaining. Sure the story is convoluted and it's a little difficult the figure out character motivations; or at least it was when I first saw it at the age of eight. Brian De Palma does am admirable job in the directors seat, which is kind of sad, since this was his last decent movie. A film like this can go either way for most people, so I'm just going to score it the way I feel, but of course take note that there are some people who dislike this one.

[7.5/10]
 
Shanghai noon, jackie chan and owen wilson, what could possible go wrong
 
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Title: Machete
Year: 2010
Country of Origin: US
Director: Robert Rodriguez & Ethan Maniquis

Story: They just ****ed with the wrong Mexican.

Review: Machete is a pitch perfect epilogue to Grindhouse and is pretty much what one would expect based on what they saw in the fake trailer. It's a massive over the to tribute to excess in violence and hyper-sexualization. It's loud and it's really violent, but if you expected anything else from this film...then you don't know Robert Rodriguez. What it isn't though is stupid, Rodriguez delivers his most politically charged film ever with this movie. How you feel about the whole immigration debate can possibly derail your enjoyment of this one. So here is an acid test to see if this film is right for you: There is a sword fight between Danny Trejo and Steven Seagal. If that seems awesome to you and seems like enough to remove the sting of the films overt political message...then see it. Other wise, you might have some problems.

[7.5/10]
 
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Just saw Machete today, it is quite the ride and loved it, but have you seen American graffiti?
 
Haven't seen:

Shanghai Noon
Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey
American Graffiti (Though I have been meaning to see this one.)
 
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Title: Franklyn
Year: 2009
Country of Origin: UK
Director: Gerald McMorrow

Story: Two separate tales taking place in two separate worlds are on a collision course with one another.

Review: There is not much to say about Franklyn other than it was a complete disappointment. I remember first seeing the trailer for this film and being amazed by it's visual style, also I was intrigued by what could have been an interesting story. Though it was all for naught since the story didn't quite carry through. The film is not terrible and it's visuals are inspired, but it's undone by the mediocre story.

[5/10]
 
Death said:
Just saw Machete today, it is quite the ride and loved it, but have you seen American graffiti?
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I'm shelving requests for a couple of day. School and work is taking a lot out of me and the reviews are starting to feel more like a task than something fun to do. So I'm just going to review movies that I want to see reviewed for a little while and then start asking for requests again.
 
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Title: Le Samoura?
Year: 1967
Country of Origin: France
Director: Jean-Pierre Melville

Story: A methodical hitman makes a mistake on a job and now is left in a difficult position.

Review: I've only seen two of Melville's films and both were excellent. The man takes a very methodical approach to filmmaking and story telling. As such I don't think this film will find much wide appeal to most who read this review, this isn't an insult...but more of a warning. If you dislike slow moving films, then you're likely to dislike this one. Though to those who this this kind of film and can weather the subtitle, then give this one a shot.

[9/10]
 
ChocolateVillain said:
Le Samourai is good. But if you really can't sit through the slow movie try out Ghost Dog.
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Agreed, though Ghost Dog: The Way of the Samurai is by no means a fast moving film. It is at least in English and has the same basic premise as Le Samoura?...oh, I haven't reviewed Ghost Dog yet.
 
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Title: Antichrist
Year: 2009
Country of Origin: Lots (In English Though)
Director: Lars von Trier

Story: After the sudden death of their child a man and his wife go to their summer cabin in a place called Eden.

Review: Okay, before we begin a few questions: Is graphic depictions of genital mutilation a major turn off to you? How about a heavily misogynistic story or seeing Willem Dafoe naked. If any of the above bothers you then stop reading this review and forget that this film exists, because it contains all of the above.

Antichrist was by far and away the most controversial film of last year and one that will definitely go down in infamy. Here is the thing though, I still haven't made up my mind on the film. I saw it maybe six or seven months ago at a film festival and I can't quite figure out what to think of the movie. Sure it's misogynistic as hell...actually I vote it the most misogynistic film of all time, but the cinematography of the film is brilliant and the acting is top notch. The story is where the trouble lies, a vexing tale that basically goes out of it's way to say that women are inherently evil. It's told in somewhat of a neo-biblical construct and in that aspect it's done very well.

The issue here is I don't know whether to give the film a great score of to give it a zero. I have friends who've seen this and loved the film and vice-versa. It's such a love it or hate it movie.


[5/10]
 
Death said:
Roadhouse, patrick swaytze(?) marathon....go go go
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Sexy Beast said:
I'm shelving requests for a couple of day. School and work is taking a lot out of me and the reviews are starting to feel more like a task than something fun to do. So I'm just going to review movies that I want to see reviewed for a little while and then start asking for requests again.
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Give me a week or so and I'll start running with requests again.
 
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