Lets talk Girls in Gaming ...

[UmaTora]

So, today (or rather tonight, since it is 2:30 in the morning and I have yet to sleep) my roommate gave me a very interesting article. Which, I invite you to read, but I doubt many will have the patience to get through the entire thing. This is a very lengthy article, written by Geordie Tait of Star City Games, to the daughter he hopes to have one day, apologizing for the way the gaming community acts, towards women in general, but he delves into some deeper issues as well, such as race and sexuality.

Personally, as a female gamer, I found this enlightening, and I hope that those of you that take the time to read this do as well.

http://www.starcitygames.com/magic/misc/22786_To_My_Someday_Daughter.html

 

[Raul Tha Monk]

Well people can rude online But not in are servers well not if im here

 

[UmaTora]

I've had some pretty bad run-ins with both pubs and eGO members. This mindset exists everywhere you go as well, not just in the gaming community.

The way I see it is this. Will this change the gaming community as a whole? No. I don't expect it to. But as long as I am doing my little part to help, that's all that counts. Even if I can get one person to look at how they treat others differently, then my job is done. ^_^

 

[Byakuya]

I've also thought about this subject, it is a shame when people act the way they do. But something to keep in mind is the fact that they are most likely 13.... (no offense to the 13 year olds.)

 

[Keith Witcher]

I didn't read the whole article because some ways through it I looked over at the scroll bar and then just skimmed the big quotes but I think I might have the rough idea about what we're talking about.

However, while there is a unique way the gaming community reacts to females sometimes it's just because that changes the vocabulary available to them. Their just as mean to guys, their mean as a whole and they just have a different vocabulary to utilize against girls.

 

[ghettosmurf]

I didn't read the whole article because some ways through it I looked over at the scroll bar and then just skimmed the big quotes but I think I might not have a rough idea about what we're talking about. The following paragraph will demonstrate that:

However, while there is a unique way the gaming community reacts to females sometimes it's just because that changes the vocabulary available to them. Their just as mean to guys, their mean as a whole and they just have a different vocabulary to utilize against girls.

Fixed.

Significant time in the article is dedicated to the fact that it's exactly that "utilization" of those words that is the issue. Everyone technically has that vocabulary available to them, by simply knowing the words and their meaning, but most of us choose not to deploy them because they are recognized as insulting, degrading, and condescending to women.

Another point made in the article is that the gamer response is hardly a "unique" response to females relative to other cliques, but can be easily be tied to a persistent assault against women throughout our culture (both within gaming and as a whole).

 

[Madvillain]

Lol. no offense but that's really sad & pathetic. Apologizing to his future daughter for how the gaming community acts? Wtf? I've sen mad girls game.. they seem aiight. I don't know.

 

[Byakuya]

Lol. no offense but that's really sad & pathetic. Apologizing to his future daughter for how the gaming community acts? Wtf? I've sen mad girls game.. they seem aiight. I don't know.

The article wasn't attesting to female gamers lack of skill.... Its talking about how they are treated. You cant be blind to the disrespect they receive, its on every consol and even PC. Which is why I love playing eGO servers, I cant do something about punks who disrespect our fellow gamers.

 

[Madvillain]

The article wasn't attesting to female gamers lack of skill.... Its talking about how they are treated. You cant be blind to the disrespect they receive, its on every consol and even PC. Which is why I love playing eGO servers, I cant do something about punks who disrespect our fellow gamers.

I never said it had anything to do with lack of skill.

 

[shan^K]

The media portrays women in such a fashion in movies and shows and songs and all that stuff, can't really be surprised when it rubs off on the audience.

 

[Sexy Beast]

The media portrays women in such a fashion in movies and shows and songs and all that stuff, can't really be surprised when it rubs off on the audience.

Not really, there is some blatant misogyny going on in the gaming community.

 

[FluffyTDestroyer]

Lol. no offense but that's really sad & pathetic. Apologizing to his future daughter for how the gaming community acts? Wtf? I've sen mad girls game.. they seem aiight. I don't know.

ohhh, Fabbrini...

I'm a female gamer. I have a 12 year old gamer daughter. I can tell you from personal experience what we deal with the moment we cue up our mic. Usually, my experience goes something like this:

Me: MG down. Need back up in field now!
Idiot: Fluffy's a girl?
Me: No, dude, I'm a woman. Still need back up in field.
Idiot: Fluffy are you hot?
Me: Nope. Got the AC kicking. Respawned, heading back to field.
Idiot: Do you have a boyfriend, Fluffy?
Me: Nope, my husband expressly forbid that when we got married.
Idiot: Do you have a pic?
Me: Could you PLEASE just play the game?
Idiot: you're prolly fat./you're prolly a lesbian./you're prolly ugly

Without fail, I get the same questions... Are you a girl? Are you hot? Do you have a boyfriend? Do you have a pic? And then there are the "anti-female" comments.. Like "Get back in the kitchen", or "Is your laptop in the kitchen?". Or there are the general idiots who follow me around from spawn to where ever, flashlighting me, smoking my position, or generally trying to get my attention so I talk to them. And when I get exasperated, and try to get them to just play the damn game: I get insulted, and they NEVER spell "probably" correctly.

And my 12 year old has to deal with the same crap.

Most of the time, it's just razzing, and you'd think we should just toughen up, and deal with it. Right? Why should we have to? Because we have ovaries? Because it's just the internet? Because chances are, these morons are just immature idiots with a pathetically lonely future filled with flipping burgers and overdue rent on a dilapidated trailer? Sure, I could buy that. BUT - I don't see males dealing with the same crap. Instead, it's the SAME tired crap, every server, every game, and often enough to be consistant.

I'm not apologizing to my "future" daughter for how the gaming community acts. I've been apologizing to my oldest daughter - for years, for how most gamers treat her. At times, the girl has "mad game". And yeah, she's "aiight". But the truest statement you posted, Fabbrini, was that you "don't know". Because it's not just a comment here or there. It's not just one gamer making innapropriate comments. It's a never ending trickle of unwelcome flirting, and when we don't want to deal with the faux-come ons, we get insulted, belittled, harassed, or just ignored as the questions get more and more personal and distracting.


But hey, when ever you want to see some mad girls game - just hop into a L4D2 game with Meg and I... and get pwnd.

 

[AnotherAsian]

Honestly, female gamers are much better than I'll ever be, and that shouldn't come as a major shock. They've been demonized and immoralized by immature, lackidaiscal, desperate-for-attention loudmouths who cant get over the fact that men aren't the only gamers in the world.

 

[xosniper]

ohhh, Fabbrini...

I'm a female gamer. I have a 12 year old gamer daughter. I can tell you from personal experience what we deal with the moment we cue up our mic. Usually, my experience goes something like this:

Me: MG down. Need back up in field now!
Idiot: Fluffy's a girl?
Me: No, dude, I'm a woman. Still need back up in field.
Idiot: Fluffy are you hot?
Me: Nope. Got the AC kicking. Respawned, heading back to field.
Idiot: Do you have a boyfriend, Fluffy?
Me: Nope, my husband expressly forbid that when we got married.
Idiot: Do you have a pic?
Me: Could you PLEASE just play the game?
Idiot: you're prolly fat./you're prolly a lesbian./you're prolly ugly

Without fail, I get the same questions... Are you a girl? Are you hot? Do you have a boyfriend? Do you have a pic? And then there are the "anti-female" comments.. Like "Get back in the kitchen", or "Is your laptop in the kitchen?". Or there are the general idiots who follow me around from spawn to where ever, flashlighting me, smoking my position, or generally trying to get my attention so I talk to them. And when I get exasperated, and try to get them to just play the damn game: I get insulted, and they NEVER spell "probably" correctly.

And my 12 year old has to deal with the same crap.

Most of the time, it's just razzing, and you'd think we should just toughen up, and deal with it. Right? Why should we have to? Because we have ovaries? Because it's just the internet? Because chances are, these morons are just immature idiots with a pathetically lonely future filled with flipping burgers and overdue rent on a dilapidated trailer? Sure, I could buy that. BUT - I don't see males dealing with the same crap. Instead, it's the SAME tired crap, every server, every game, and often enough to be consistant.

I'm not apologizing to my "future" daughter for how the gaming community acts. I've been apologizing to my oldest daughter - for years, for how most gamers treat her. At times, the girl has "mad game". And yeah, she's "aiight". But the truest statement you posted, Fabbrini, was that you "don't know". Because it's not just a comment here or there. It's not just one gamer making innapropriate comments. It's a never ending trickle of unwelcome flirting, and when we don't want to deal with the faux-come ons, we get insulted, belittled, harassed, or just ignored as the questions get more and more personal and distracting.


But hey, when ever you want to see some mad girls game - just hop into a L4D2 game with Meg and I... and get pwnd.

/thread



My daughter is 17 and has refused to play in the past due to the way guys/kids/turds talk to her while gaming. If all the horn dogs want is to get a girl to talk to them, maybe being yourself while talking to them is a good idea. You never know, you might get a pic after awhile.


turds


/rant

 

[Cyclone]

Fluffy just won this thread. Xo, and this goes for everyone, ALL of the 12-year old's who pull out the "Get back to the kitchen" or "I didn't know your computer room was a kitchen" are just stupid and just want to be the center of attention. If I ever see this on servers, I will eat them alive(so to speak). I do not tolerate this ONE bit, and if the server your daughter/sister/cousin etc... is playing in a server were the admins either don't care or even JOIN IN, that is NOT a good server. It's best to seek an admin and let them handle it(If your not an admin or in another server, but most of the time, if your here, don't worry about Sexism). Good post Fluffy and xo, along with OP. There is also a Sexual Harassment and eGO thread which I encourage EVERYONE who hasn't read it, to read it FULLY.

 

[Stick]

ohhh, Fabbrini...

I'm a female gamer. I have a 12 year old gamer daughter. I can tell you from personal experience what we deal with the moment we cue up our mic. Usually, my experience goes something like this:

Me: MG down. Need back up in field now!
Idiot: Fluffy's a girl?
Me: No, dude, I'm a woman. Still need back up in field.
Idiot: Fluffy are you hot?
Me: Nope. Got the AC kicking. Respawned, heading back to field.
Idiot: Do you have a boyfriend, Fluffy?
Me: Nope, my husband expressly forbid that when we got married.
Idiot: Do you have a pic?
Me: Could you PLEASE just play the game?
Idiot: you're prolly fat./you're prolly a lesbian./you're prolly ugly

Without fail, I get the same questions... Are you a girl? Are you hot? Do you have a boyfriend? Do you have a pic? And then there are the "anti-female" comments.. Like "Get back in the kitchen", or "Is your laptop in the kitchen?". Or there are the general idiots who follow me around from spawn to where ever, flashlighting me, smoking my position, or generally trying to get my attention so I talk to them. And when I get exasperated, and try to get them to just play the damn game: I get insulted, and they NEVER spell "probably" correctly.

And my 12 year old has to deal with the same crap.

Most of the time, it's just razzing, and you'd think we should just toughen up, and deal with it. Right? Why should we have to? Because we have ovaries? Because it's just the internet? Because chances are, these morons are just immature idiots with a pathetically lonely future filled with flipping burgers and overdue rent on a dilapidated trailer? Sure, I could buy that. BUT - I don't see males dealing with the same crap. Instead, it's the SAME tired crap, every server, every game, and often enough to be consistant.

I'm not apologizing to my "future" daughter for how the gaming community acts. I've been apologizing to my oldest daughter - for years, for how most gamers treat her. At times, the girl has "mad game". And yeah, she's "aiight". But the truest statement you posted, Fabbrini, was that you "don't know". Because it's not just a comment here or there. It's not just one gamer making innapropriate comments. It's a never ending trickle of unwelcome flirting, and when we don't want to deal with the faux-come ons, we get insulted, belittled, harassed, or just ignored as the questions get more and more personal and distracting.


But hey, when ever you want to see some mad girls game - just hop into a L4D2 game with Meg and I... and get pwnd.

Fluffys a girl!? No way! Totally wouldn't have figured that and am completely surprised by the fact! In all seriousness though I am always amazed by the resilience of female gamers being able to deal with so many guys over the internet trying to flirt because they have never even been able to probably talk to a female in real life. Also this is another benefit of edge gamers is that even though we don't always stop sexism we take care of a lot of it to make this community even better.

 

[LadyFace]

I've had some guys bug me, but no one said you couldn't just ignore them. Most of them, you joke along with them, it stops mattering.

I've barely had any issues, not saying they don't exist, but I've just noticed that when I don't feed the trolls or assholes, they back off. I mostly play with the guys on eGO and they've never given me beef for being a girl. Maybe once or twice jokingly, but the thing is, if you can't take the heat then get out? I mean, sometimes it's just a matter of learning how to take a joke.

But that's just me, most of my friends are guys and I'm known for making 'I should get back to the kitchen and make some sammiches' jokes and the like. It just doesn't bother me!

And if there are some actual dudes trying to hit on me or whatever, I honestly just ignore them, simple as that. Same principle applies to real life.

 

[FluffyTDestroyer]

I'm so happy eGO is above the prejudice and sexism. We treat our girl gamers with respect and kindness.

Why, just the other day someone asked me, "Hey Shadow, what can I do to get promoted?", to which I replied, "Become a girl."

Wow, Shadow. Just... wow.

 

[Ramp]

I've known a female eGO member for about 2 yours now and every time were in vent or in game fluffies scenario comes up all the time. It's kind of fun to toy with the person doing this, but sometimes even as a guy I get creeped out by what people say o.o

 

[LadyFace]

ohhh, Fabbrini...

I'm a female gamer. I have a 12 year old gamer daughter. I can tell you from personal experience what we deal with the moment we cue up our mic. Usually, my experience goes something like this:

Me: MG down. Need back up in field now!
Idiot: Fluffy's a girl?
Me: No, dude, I'm a woman. Still need back up in field.
Idiot: Fluffy are you hot?
Me: Nope. Got the AC kicking. Respawned, heading back to field.
Idiot: Do you have a boyfriend, Fluffy?
Me: Nope, my husband expressly forbid that when we got married.
Idiot: Do you have a pic?
Me: Could you PLEASE just play the game?
Idiot: you're prolly fat./you're prolly a lesbian./you're prolly ugly

Without fail, I get the same questions... Are you a girl? Are you hot? Do you have a boyfriend? Do you have a pic? And then there are the "anti-female" comments.. Like "Get back in the kitchen", or "Is your laptop in the kitchen?". Or there are the general idiots who follow me around from spawn to where ever, flashlighting me, smoking my position, or generally trying to get my attention so I talk to them. And when I get exasperated, and try to get them to just play the damn game: I get insulted, and they NEVER spell "probably" correctly.

And my 12 year old has to deal with the same crap.

Most of the time, it's just razzing, and you'd think we should just toughen up, and deal with it. Right? Why should we have to? Because we have ovaries? Because it's just the internet? Because chances are, these morons are just immature idiots with a pathetically lonely future filled with flipping burgers and overdue rent on a dilapidated trailer? Sure, I could buy that. BUT - I don't see males dealing with the same crap. Instead, it's the SAME tired crap, every server, every game, and often enough to be consistant.

I'm not apologizing to my "future" daughter for how the gaming community acts. I've been apologizing to my oldest daughter - for years, for how most gamers treat her. At times, the girl has "mad game". And yeah, she's "aiight". But the truest statement you posted, Fabbrini, was that you "don't know". Because it's not just a comment here or there. It's not just one gamer making innapropriate comments. It's a never ending trickle of unwelcome flirting, and when we don't want to deal with the faux-come ons, we get insulted, belittled, harassed, or just ignored as the questions get more and more personal and distracting.


But hey, when ever you want to see some mad girls game - just hop into a L4D2 game with Meg and I... and get pwnd.

I NEVER have this problem. And I play CSS and DoD(from time to time anyway). Maybe it's just strange luck, or maybe my name is not obvious enough, but I don't ever get harassed. I've had jokes, and I make them back. I mostly play with my friends that are eGO admins. But I also play without them, but I NEVER get that.

I guess you guys have bad luck? Lol.