- Joined
- Aug 2, 2009
- Messages
- 2,019
Read Part I
Read Part II
When I got home I began to think about things. The main problem I ran into when first confronting leadership was that they had strength in numbers and I was meeting them in their chosen location. With giving up not being an option, since I felt so many people were counting on me, I had to continue my search. I knew the answers to my questions had to lie with leadership. My next move was a clear one to me--I had to utilize the advantage of surprise and to approach them one by one. I set to pack my bags again.
My first trip was to the closest leader, in Oregon--Division Leader Spray. I arrived in Redmond, or as they like to call it "The Heart of Central Oregon." 'How cute', I thought to myself. At least I knew I wasn't going to run into any Dollar Generals here.
'Then again,' I thought to myself, 'How exactly am I planning on running into Spray?'
I was randomly driving around town for about half an hour, really not sure what I was looking for, when suddenly I found it. Parked at a construction site was a truck from Oregon Foam. It had a large tank in the back that said 'SPRAY'. The driver door read:
'Well...it's a start...' I thought.
I went to the address and walked inside. "Corey, what are you doing?" I muttered quietly to myself as I opened the door. There were only a few people in the building and I approached a young man in overalls, with "CHARLES" sewn onto the chest.
"Spray?" I asked.
He turned and looked at me and said, "Why yes, this is Oregon Foam, your primary source for spray foam insulation in Oregon. How may I help you?"
I needed a more direct approach, if I was going to just roam around town, looking for a man I have never met."I am YoSpankDawg." I told him, swallowing my pride and wondering what kind of a nut this guy would think he was dealing with. With a suddenly-shocked look on his face, he motioned me to the back and said, "Follow me."
Realizing I guessed right, I matched his shocked look, but complied with his request. I followed him back to a small office where he sat down slowly.
"What do you want, and how did you find me?" he asked.
"I want answers, and I really don't know." was my response. I felt it was a succinct evaluation of the situation. "What are you guys hiding?"
"Look, Spank, first of all, I can't believe you tracked me down about this. There is seriously nothing going on that the D.o.D. leadership is hiding from everybody. It's just a game! We play to have fun. That's it. The structure, rules, regulations--those are all just to make sure we have a welcoming and friendly environment for everybody." He paused for a minute, and then, eyes narrowing, he asked, "You seriously tracked me down just to ask about this, didn't you?"
"Yeah...pretty much." I admitted. I also added, though I still don't know why, "I actually took trips to Illinois and Missouri before this. haha"
"Why there?" he inquired.
I contemplated making something up, but figured I'd tell the truth and gauge his reaction. "Well...I mapped out where all of the leadership lives and then found the geometric center point, figuring whatever you guys were hiding would be found in the middle of you and those are the places it took me."
"Wow...you're a strange dude with way too much time on his hands." he said, shaking his head. "Well, again, there is nothing going on that I am aware of. I'd think if there were, you'd find what you were looking for at the e.G.O. servers."
"The servers??" I repeated.
"Well yeah. That's pretty much where we all meet up from around the world, if you think about it. They're our common link. Makes sense, no?"
"Yeah...yeah I suppose you're right..." I admitted.
"Do you know where they are?" he asked me, continuing before I could respond, "Listen, you're from Washington so that practically makes us neighbors, so I'll help you out. They're in two locations actually, but pretty close to each other. Fort Worth and Houston, Texas. But...again...I don't think you're going to find anything there."
The conversation continued for a few minutes longer, but Spray mostly dominated the conversation because I was too busy thinking about the servers and wondering if they might actually be the key. At least it wasn't the first lead that came from somewhere other than the mess of wires known as my own brain, so that alone made it worth checking out.
I had never been to Texas. I wasn't so sure that early August was the best time to visit for a Washingtonian like myself, either, what with the fricken heat and all. It took me several days to track down the specific locations of the servers in the fricken heat. Then I realized, as I should have initially suspected, that it was nothing more than a building with a bunch of servers in it being rented out for anything and everything in the fricking heat. It was at this point that I had to admit Spray was right about there being nothing to find here and that I had run down a dead end...in the fricken heat.
'Sigh, I suppose it would have been just as hot had I continued my "leadership circuit" and visited General Nuisance in the heart of Central California...' I thought, somberly.
"the heart of central California...the heart of central California" rang in my head. Why was I suddenly having a feeling of deja vu? My mind instantly pictured the sign as I entered Redmond, OR.
"Welcome to Redmond, the heart of Central Oregon."
The last coincidence I unearthed proved to be more than just that, so I quickly decided to change my plane ticket from Washington to California. I was going back on my "leadership circuit."
I arrived in Elk Grove feeling very much the same as when I first arrived in Redmond, wondering what it was I was looking for. My first stop was at the edge of the city, though, to read a plaque by the "Welcome to Elk Grove" sign. I wasn't sure what sort of clues it might provide, but I didn't want to potentially miss anything here.
"blah blah blah gold rush...blah blah blah, Monterey Trail...blah blah blah blah blah."
Nothing stood out to me, so I began to look for General Nuisance. Really, I spent several hours hoping to find some sort of vehicle that said "GENERAL NUISANCE" on it, since I had no better strategy, but no such luck. Finally, I stopped at the library. I knew that nobody ever learned anything at a library, but I was willing to break the trend.
Ok, so I was breaking the trend tomorrow, because I was a few minutes late and the library was closed. I guess the town shuts down around here early on a Wednesday evening. :S
Just as I was going to leave, something posted on the bulletin board by the entrance caught my eye. "County of Sacramento Municipal Services Agency" the sign read, but that isn't what caught my eye. The sign read (amongst other listings):
The next morning I pulled up to the address listed on the bottom of the form and saw "Discovery Park" across the street. "Real cute," I said, with a chuckle. I walked inside, checked the directory, and headed for the appropriate office.
I approached the man seated behind the counter. He seemed to be a few years older than myself and he was actually the only person who seemed to be around on this Thursday morning. I jumped right into things. It had been working thus far, right?
"Excuse me..." I stopped to check the name placard sitting on the counter, "Brent...do you know where I could find somebody who goes by the name 'General Nuisance'?"
"Who are you?" He asked.
"I am YoSpankDawg." I offered.
"What do you want?" he asked, adding, "Do you have a noise complaint? Were your mom and I too loud last night?"
"Wait...what?" I said, taken aback by what I just heard.
"Yeah, now I see where you get the name from--must run in the family. She was a fan of the spankings too."
"Uh...dude...for reals? That's too much."
"That's what she said!" he continued.
I shook my head and remembered why I came here in the first place. "Listen, I know what you guys have planned, and I know when...I just don't know why." I lied, hoping to get some piece of information out of him.
"Cause she enjoys it and so do I." he said, with a laugh.
"What? No! Not that! The Day of Defeat leadership!" I was beginning to get majorly annoyed. "Why have you guys done all of this and why did you hide it from all of us?!"
"Awwww....somebody is upset that he wasn't in the loop...." he said, adding a stupid pouty face. "Poor lil' guy..."
"No! I don't care about that!" I yelled.
"Mad that our plans are going so well and there isn't a damn thing you can do about it?" he tried again.
"No..." I said, beginning to realize that this last one was probably true, since I didn't actually know what was going or when, like I claimed.
"Oh I know. I just have to remember who I am dealing with! You're just mad cause you're not the chosen one! HA!" he said, triumphantly.
"N-...wait...what? 'Chosen one'?" I inquired.
Suddenly his expression changed as he realized what he had done. Before I knew it, I was being escorted out of his office by two large, armed guards. As I sat in my rental car (some of ya might have been wondering about the car, huh?) in the parking lot, I could only think about one thing...
"The chosen one? What chosen one?"
I went on a mission to find answers, but all I have done so far is added to my questions.
"The chosen one....??"
...to be continued...
(I decided to make this one double-long--as I might do with the rest--otherwise it was going to drag out to about 10 parts. Please let me know if you prefer the shorter sections at a time, or the bigger chunks like this to finish quicker)
Read Part II
When I got home I began to think about things. The main problem I ran into when first confronting leadership was that they had strength in numbers and I was meeting them in their chosen location. With giving up not being an option, since I felt so many people were counting on me, I had to continue my search. I knew the answers to my questions had to lie with leadership. My next move was a clear one to me--I had to utilize the advantage of surprise and to approach them one by one. I set to pack my bags again.
My first trip was to the closest leader, in Oregon--Division Leader Spray. I arrived in Redmond, or as they like to call it "The Heart of Central Oregon." 'How cute', I thought to myself. At least I knew I wasn't going to run into any Dollar Generals here.
'Then again,' I thought to myself, 'How exactly am I planning on running into Spray?'I was randomly driving around town for about half an hour, really not sure what I was looking for, when suddenly I found it. Parked at a construction site was a truck from Oregon Foam. It had a large tank in the back that said 'SPRAY'. The driver door read:
OREGON FOAM
SPRAY FOAM INSULATION IN OREGON
1881 SW First St.
Redmond, OR 97756
SPRAY FOAM INSULATION IN OREGON
1881 SW First St.
Redmond, OR 97756
'Well...it's a start...' I thought.
I went to the address and walked inside. "Corey, what are you doing?" I muttered quietly to myself as I opened the door. There were only a few people in the building and I approached a young man in overalls, with "CHARLES" sewn onto the chest.
"Spray?" I asked.
He turned and looked at me and said, "Why yes, this is Oregon Foam, your primary source for spray foam insulation in Oregon. How may I help you?"
I needed a more direct approach, if I was going to just roam around town, looking for a man I have never met."I am YoSpankDawg." I told him, swallowing my pride and wondering what kind of a nut this guy would think he was dealing with. With a suddenly-shocked look on his face, he motioned me to the back and said, "Follow me."
Realizing I guessed right, I matched his shocked look, but complied with his request. I followed him back to a small office where he sat down slowly.
"What do you want, and how did you find me?" he asked.
"I want answers, and I really don't know." was my response. I felt it was a succinct evaluation of the situation. "What are you guys hiding?"
"Look, Spank, first of all, I can't believe you tracked me down about this. There is seriously nothing going on that the D.o.D. leadership is hiding from everybody. It's just a game! We play to have fun. That's it. The structure, rules, regulations--those are all just to make sure we have a welcoming and friendly environment for everybody." He paused for a minute, and then, eyes narrowing, he asked, "You seriously tracked me down just to ask about this, didn't you?"
"Yeah...pretty much." I admitted. I also added, though I still don't know why, "I actually took trips to Illinois and Missouri before this. haha"
"Why there?" he inquired.
I contemplated making something up, but figured I'd tell the truth and gauge his reaction. "Well...I mapped out where all of the leadership lives and then found the geometric center point, figuring whatever you guys were hiding would be found in the middle of you and those are the places it took me."
"Wow...you're a strange dude with way too much time on his hands." he said, shaking his head. "Well, again, there is nothing going on that I am aware of. I'd think if there were, you'd find what you were looking for at the e.G.O. servers."
"The servers??" I repeated.
"Well yeah. That's pretty much where we all meet up from around the world, if you think about it. They're our common link. Makes sense, no?"
"Yeah...yeah I suppose you're right..." I admitted.
"Do you know where they are?" he asked me, continuing before I could respond, "Listen, you're from Washington so that practically makes us neighbors, so I'll help you out. They're in two locations actually, but pretty close to each other. Fort Worth and Houston, Texas. But...again...I don't think you're going to find anything there."
The conversation continued for a few minutes longer, but Spray mostly dominated the conversation because I was too busy thinking about the servers and wondering if they might actually be the key. At least it wasn't the first lead that came from somewhere other than the mess of wires known as my own brain, so that alone made it worth checking out.
I had never been to Texas. I wasn't so sure that early August was the best time to visit for a Washingtonian like myself, either, what with the fricken heat and all. It took me several days to track down the specific locations of the servers in the fricken heat. Then I realized, as I should have initially suspected, that it was nothing more than a building with a bunch of servers in it being rented out for anything and everything in the fricking heat. It was at this point that I had to admit Spray was right about there being nothing to find here and that I had run down a dead end...in the fricken heat.
'Sigh, I suppose it would have been just as hot had I continued my "leadership circuit" and visited General Nuisance in the heart of Central California...' I thought, somberly.
"the heart of central California...the heart of central California" rang in my head. Why was I suddenly having a feeling of deja vu? My mind instantly pictured the sign as I entered Redmond, OR.
"Welcome to Redmond, the heart of Central Oregon."
The last coincidence I unearthed proved to be more than just that, so I quickly decided to change my plane ticket from Washington to California. I was going back on my "leadership circuit."
I arrived in Elk Grove feeling very much the same as when I first arrived in Redmond, wondering what it was I was looking for. My first stop was at the edge of the city, though, to read a plaque by the "Welcome to Elk Grove" sign. I wasn't sure what sort of clues it might provide, but I didn't want to potentially miss anything here.
"blah blah blah gold rush...blah blah blah, Monterey Trail...blah blah blah blah blah."
Nothing stood out to me, so I began to look for General Nuisance. Really, I spent several hours hoping to find some sort of vehicle that said "GENERAL NUISANCE" on it, since I had no better strategy, but no such luck. Finally, I stopped at the library. I knew that nobody ever learned anything at a library, but I was willing to break the trend.
Ok, so I was breaking the trend tomorrow, because I was a few minutes late and the library was closed. I guess the town shuts down around here early on a Wednesday evening. :S
Just as I was going to leave, something posted on the bulletin board by the entrance caught my eye. "County of Sacramento Municipal Services Agency" the sign read, but that isn't what caught my eye. The sign read (amongst other listings):
Daytime Calls,
Inquiries, General Information
Hazard & Nuisance Complaints
Community Resource and Assistance Center
(Monday through Friday 7a.m. - 9:00 p.m.)
Abandoned vehicles, hazardous material spills,
nuisance animals, odors, substandard housing,
zoning violations, drainage, flooding,
missed pick-up service, Neighborhood Clean-Up,
and waste cans. (916) 875-5656
...but all I saw, at the top, in the middle, was:Inquiries, General Information
Hazard & Nuisance Complaints
Community Resource and Assistance Center
(Monday through Friday 7a.m. - 9:00 p.m.)
Abandoned vehicles, hazardous material spills,
nuisance animals, odors, substandard housing,
zoning violations, drainage, flooding,
missed pick-up service, Neighborhood Clean-Up,
and waste cans. (916) 875-5656
Daytime Calls,
Inquiries, General Information
Hazard & Nuisance Complaints
Community Resource and Assistance Center
(Monday through Friday 7a.m. - 9:00 p.m.)
Abandoned vehicles, hazardous material spills,
nuisance animals, odors, substandard housing,
zoning violations, drainage, flooding,
missed pick-up service, Neighborhood Clean-Up,
and waste cans. (916) 875-5656
'It's a long shot,' I thought, 'But then again so was Oregon Foam...'Inquiries, General Information
Hazard & Nuisance Complaints
Community Resource and Assistance Center
(Monday through Friday 7a.m. - 9:00 p.m.)
Abandoned vehicles, hazardous material spills,
nuisance animals, odors, substandard housing,
zoning violations, drainage, flooding,
missed pick-up service, Neighborhood Clean-Up,
and waste cans. (916) 875-5656
The next morning I pulled up to the address listed on the bottom of the form and saw "Discovery Park" across the street. "Real cute," I said, with a chuckle. I walked inside, checked the directory, and headed for the appropriate office.
I approached the man seated behind the counter. He seemed to be a few years older than myself and he was actually the only person who seemed to be around on this Thursday morning. I jumped right into things. It had been working thus far, right?
"Excuse me..." I stopped to check the name placard sitting on the counter, "Brent...do you know where I could find somebody who goes by the name 'General Nuisance'?"
"Who are you?" He asked.
"I am YoSpankDawg." I offered.
"What do you want?" he asked, adding, "Do you have a noise complaint? Were your mom and I too loud last night?"
"Wait...what?" I said, taken aback by what I just heard.
"Yeah, now I see where you get the name from--must run in the family. She was a fan of the spankings too."
"Uh...dude...for reals? That's too much."
"That's what she said!" he continued.
I shook my head and remembered why I came here in the first place. "Listen, I know what you guys have planned, and I know when...I just don't know why." I lied, hoping to get some piece of information out of him.
"Cause she enjoys it and so do I." he said, with a laugh.
"What? No! Not that! The Day of Defeat leadership!" I was beginning to get majorly annoyed. "Why have you guys done all of this and why did you hide it from all of us?!"
"Awwww....somebody is upset that he wasn't in the loop...." he said, adding a stupid pouty face. "Poor lil' guy..."
"No! I don't care about that!" I yelled.
"Mad that our plans are going so well and there isn't a damn thing you can do about it?" he tried again.
"No..." I said, beginning to realize that this last one was probably true, since I didn't actually know what was going or when, like I claimed.
"Oh I know. I just have to remember who I am dealing with! You're just mad cause you're not the chosen one! HA!" he said, triumphantly.
"N-...wait...what? 'Chosen one'?" I inquired.
Suddenly his expression changed as he realized what he had done. Before I knew it, I was being escorted out of his office by two large, armed guards. As I sat in my rental car (some of ya might have been wondering about the car, huh?
) in the parking lot, I could only think about one thing..."The chosen one? What chosen one?"
I went on a mission to find answers, but all I have done so far is added to my questions.
"The chosen one....??"
...to be continued...
(I decided to make this one double-long--as I might do with the rest--otherwise it was going to drag out to about 10 parts. Please let me know if you prefer the shorter sections at a time, or the bigger chunks like this to finish quicker)
. Too bad thats not the confirmed work address of General Nuisance :/ No prank calls from me! lol. Can't wait for more additions to this!!
