- Joined
- Jul 9, 2009
- Messages
- 427
For spoiler, check the bottom. DO NOT POST WITHOUT READING THE RED TEXT AT THE BOTTOM!
This letter has three main sections. In the first, I argue that you can observe a definite bias in Mr. Actinoob Vatesauce's musings relating to the worst classes of hopeless smut peddlers there are. In the second, I make it clear that if Actinoob were to dismantle the guard rails that protect society from the ill-tempered elements in its midst, it would be a grave insult to everyone who devoted his or her life's work to helping the less fortunate. And in the third and final section, I conclude that he is capable of going berserk without notice. It isn't important whether you agree with every detail that I intend to present. What matters is that you begin to realize that everything I've said so far is by way of introduction to the key point I want to make in this letter. My key point is that Actinoob doesn't give a tinker's damn about any of us. If you find that fact distressing then you should help me remove the misunderstanding that Actinoob has created in the minds of myriad people throughout the world. Either that, or you can crawl into a corner and lament that you got yourself born in the wrong universe. Don't expect your sobbing to do much good, however, because Actinoob's loud witticisms cater to the lowest common denominator. A person could write a whole book on that topic alone. In order to be as brief as possible, though, I'll state simply that the first thing we need to do is to get Actinoob to admit that he has a problem. He should be counseled to recite the following:
I, Actinoob Vatesauce, am a sniffish lunkhead.
I have been a participant in a giant scheme to create widespread hysteria.
I hereby admit my addiction to voyeurism. I ask for the strength and wisdom to fight this addiction.
Once Actinoob realizes that he has a problem, maybe then he'll see that the picture I am presenting need not be confined to his histrionics. It applies to everything Actinoob says and does.
Do you really think Actinoob will ever learn from his mistakes? This probably does not affect your daily life, but it is a fact. There is no place in this country where we are safe from his acolytes, no place where we are not targeted for hatred and attack. While Actinoob is out subjugating persons of culture, refinement, and learning to maladroit traitors, the general public is shouldering the bill. Sadly, this is a bill of shattered minds, broken hearts and homes, depression and all its attendant miseries, and a despondency about Actinoob's attempts to weave his catty traits, yellow-bellied ultimata, and disagreeable slurs into a rich tapestry that is sure to advocate sophomoric perversions. Will headstrong, malodorous smear merchants ever brush away the cobwebs of absenteeism? Don't bet on it. While Actinoob is certainly entitled to ignore good advice from intelligent people, he would have us believe that he has his moral compass in tact. Yeah, right. And I also suppose that we'll be moved by some heartfelt words on the glories of insurrectionism? The fact of the matter is that we are at war. Don't think we're not just because you're not stepping over dead bodies in the streets. We're at war with Actinoob's choleric indiscretions. We're at war with his surly quips. And we're at war with his pushy adages. As in any war, we ought to be aware of the fact that Actinoob once had the audacity to tell me that his coterie is looking out for our best interests. My riposte was that if you don't think that he expects everyone else to cater to his every idiosyncratic whim, then you've missed the whole point of this letter.
Actinoob is too pharisaical to reason with. History offers innumerable examples for the truth of this assertion. I'm sure he wouldn't want me to eavesdrop on his secret conversations. So why does Actinoob want to advocate his homilies amid a hue and cry as dodgy as it is insensitive? A complete answer to that question would take more space than I can afford, so I'll have to give you a simplified answer. For starters, he thinks we want him to blame our societal problems on handy scapegoats. Excuse me, but maybe a large percentage of his secret agents can be termed refractory. The destruction of the Tower of Babel, be it a literal truth, an allegory, or a mere story based upon cultural archetypes, illustrates this truth plainly.
If you want to clear up these muddied waters with some reality, then tell everyone you know the truth, that I shall not argue that Actinoob's newsgroup postings are an authentic map of his plan to unleash an unparalleled wave of militarism. Read them and see for yourself. Our battle with Actinoob is a battle between spiritualism and larrikinism, between tradition and subversion, between the defenders of Western civilization and its enemies. With the battle lines drawn as such, it is abundantly clear that most people don't realize that Actinoob has already revealed his plans to implant within the government a set of fifth columnists who are devoted to his dream of denying the obvious. He revealed these plans in a manifesto bearing all of the hallmarks of having been written by a shallow pervert. Not only is his manifesto entirely lacking in logic, relentlessly subjective, and totally anecdotal, but every time Actinoob tells his helots that our only chance of saving the planet is to accept unending regulations and straightjacket "reforms" from his trained seals, their eyes roll into the backs of their heads as they become mindless receptacles of unsubstantiated information, which they accept without question. What I find frightening is that some academics actually believe Actinoob's line that a richly evocative description of a problem automatically implies the correct solution to that problem. In this case, "academics" refers to a stratum of the residual intelligentsia surviving the recession of its demotic base, not to those seekers of truth who understand that I want to make this clear so that those who do not understand deeper messages embedded within sarcastic irony—and you know who I'm referring to—can process my point.
Actinoob exhibits a startling lack of remorse, shame, and guilt for so brazenly attempting to destroy our youths' ability to relax, reflect, study, and meditate. It may be more correct, however, to say that Actinoob has been trying for some time to sell the public on a solecism-based government. His sales pitch proceeds both pragmatically and emotionally. The pragmatic argument: University professors must conform their theses and conclusions to Actinoob's moonstruck prejudices if they want to publish papers and advance their careers. The emotional argument: Everyone and everything discriminates against him—including the writing on the bathroom stalls. As you can see, neither argument is valid, which should indicate to you that if you looked up "scornful" in the dictionary, you'd probably see Actinoob's picture.
In all fairness, Actinoob has announced his intentions to construct gas chambers, incinerators, gulags, and concentration camps. While doing so may earn Actinoob a gold star from the mush-for-brains ruffianism crowd, he's obviously under the influence of LSD or some other hallucinogenic. Why else would Actinoob profess that the Earth is flat? He demands obeisance from his drones. Then, once they prove their loyalty, Actinoob forces them to pull the levers of boosterism and oil the gears of onanism. Not only have loopy, frowsy devotees of conspiracy theories of one sort or another decided to glorify their mottos by dressing them up as moral and righteous prerogatives, but their credos are being debated as though they were actually reasonable.
The practical struggle which now begins, sketched in broad outlines, takes the following course: Actinoob is capable of only two things, namely whining and underhanded tricks. I, not being one of the many barbaric foppotees of this world, have long been under the impression that his undertakings are uncalled for, but that's a story for another time. For now, I want to focus on the way that I've long thought it would be fun to try to explain to Actinoob how when one looks at this snippy parade of peremptory New Age bohemians, one instantly thinks of the word "thymolsulphonephthalein". For the most part, I'm just curious as to how deep Actinoob will have to dig into his profanity thesaurus to formulate a response. While the concept of broad-based peace and social justice coalitions remains desirable, he is more than merely whiney. He's ?ber-whiney. In fact, Actinoob is so whiney that the most believable explanation for many of the destructive trends in politics, economics, morality, and other key areas over the past two years is that a secretive, incredibly beer-guzzling, well-organized movement has been striving relentlessly to bad-mouth worthy causes. For the benefit of any doubting Thomases I will prove that point via an explanation of how Actinoob dreams of a time when he'll be free to incite pogroms, purges, and other mayhem. That's the way he's planned it, and that's the way it'll happen—not may happen but will happen—if we don't interfere, if we don't raise a stink about Actinoob and his deranged ideas.
Let's conduct a Gedankenexperiment. Suppose we could create a hypothetical population free of cuckoo nebbishes. Let's assume, furthermore, that Actinoob were powerless to reduce human beings and many other living organisms to engineered products and mere cogs in the social machine. In this hypothetical situation, wouldn't we all be free to challenge him to defend his contrivances or else to change them? Let's make this dream a reality. Let's get people to realize that we need to identify, challenge, defy, disrupt, and, finally, destroy the institutions that reconstitute society on the basis of arrested development and envious malevolence. Why? Because of what's at stake: literally everything.
Actinoob's reports are a spiritually destructive propaganda instrument aimed at our children. Be patient; I won't ask you to take that on faith. Rather, I'll provide irrefragable proof that Actinoob, already oppressive with his mealymouthed editorials, will perhaps be the ultimate exterminator of our human species—if separate species we be—for his reserve of unguessed horrors could never be borne by mortal brains if loosed upon the world. If you think that that's a frightening thought then consider that Actinoob keeps stating over and over again that ebola, AIDS, mad-cow disease, and the hantavirus were intentionally bioengineered by abusive simpletons for the purpose of population reduction. This drumbeat refrain is clearly not consistent with the facts on the ground—facts such as that Actinoob's accomplices have the gall to accuse me of laying the foundation for some serious mischief. Were these obscene swaggerers born without a self-awareness gene? Well, we all know the answer to that question, don't we? In case you don't, you should note that I want to let Actinoob know, in no uncertain terms, that it's pestiferous skinflints that make disgusting fascism possible. But first, let me pose an abstract question. Why can't he simply enjoy the fruits of his own labors and let other people enjoy the fruits of theirs? It is only when one has an answer to that question is it possible to make sense of his publicity stunts because his plans for the future are rife with contradictions and difficulties; they're absolutely tactless, meet no objective criteria, and are unsuited for a supposedly educated population. And as if that weren't enough, many people are convinced that I am asking the readers of this letter to be aware that he is a hypocrite who preaches morality and virtue while simultaneously muting the voice of anyone who dares to speak out against him. I can't comment on that, but I can say that by refusing to act, by refusing to find the common ground that enables others to warn the public against those virulent used-car salesmen whose positive accomplishments are always practically nil but whose conceit can scarcely be excelled, we are giving Actinoob the power to rewrite and reword much of humanity's formative works to favor exclusivism.
Actinoob has never gotten ahead because of his hard work or innovative ideas. Rather, all of Actinoob's successes are due to kickbacks, bribes, black market double-dealing, outright thuggery, and unsavory political intrigue. Despite some perceptions to the contrary, the pen is a powerful tool. Why don't we use that tool to advance a clear, credible, and effective vision for dealing with our present dilemma and its most amoral manifestations? Finding the best way to suggest the kind of politics and policies that are needed to restore good sense to this important debate is a challenging problem indeed. We must therefore tackle this problem with more determination, more tenacity, and more fanaticism than it has ever been tackled before. Only then will people realize that my only wonder is, What is it about our society that makes argumentative defalcators like Actinoob desire to propitiate subversive, vicious tatterdemalions for later eventualities? Any honest person who takes the time to think about that question will be forced to conclude that adversarialism has served as the justification for the butchering, torture, and enslavement of more people than any other "ism". That's why it's Actinoob's favorite; it makes it easy for him to spread lies, propaganda, and misinformation. Until we address this issue, we will never move beyond it.
IT'S A JOKE IF IT WASN'T OBVIOUS ENOUGH. Actinoob is mah fwend <3
http://www.pakin.org/complaint Complaint Generator
This letter has three main sections. In the first, I argue that you can observe a definite bias in Mr. Actinoob Vatesauce's musings relating to the worst classes of hopeless smut peddlers there are. In the second, I make it clear that if Actinoob were to dismantle the guard rails that protect society from the ill-tempered elements in its midst, it would be a grave insult to everyone who devoted his or her life's work to helping the less fortunate. And in the third and final section, I conclude that he is capable of going berserk without notice. It isn't important whether you agree with every detail that I intend to present. What matters is that you begin to realize that everything I've said so far is by way of introduction to the key point I want to make in this letter. My key point is that Actinoob doesn't give a tinker's damn about any of us. If you find that fact distressing then you should help me remove the misunderstanding that Actinoob has created in the minds of myriad people throughout the world. Either that, or you can crawl into a corner and lament that you got yourself born in the wrong universe. Don't expect your sobbing to do much good, however, because Actinoob's loud witticisms cater to the lowest common denominator. A person could write a whole book on that topic alone. In order to be as brief as possible, though, I'll state simply that the first thing we need to do is to get Actinoob to admit that he has a problem. He should be counseled to recite the following:
I, Actinoob Vatesauce, am a sniffish lunkhead.
I have been a participant in a giant scheme to create widespread hysteria.
I hereby admit my addiction to voyeurism. I ask for the strength and wisdom to fight this addiction.
Once Actinoob realizes that he has a problem, maybe then he'll see that the picture I am presenting need not be confined to his histrionics. It applies to everything Actinoob says and does.
Do you really think Actinoob will ever learn from his mistakes? This probably does not affect your daily life, but it is a fact. There is no place in this country where we are safe from his acolytes, no place where we are not targeted for hatred and attack. While Actinoob is out subjugating persons of culture, refinement, and learning to maladroit traitors, the general public is shouldering the bill. Sadly, this is a bill of shattered minds, broken hearts and homes, depression and all its attendant miseries, and a despondency about Actinoob's attempts to weave his catty traits, yellow-bellied ultimata, and disagreeable slurs into a rich tapestry that is sure to advocate sophomoric perversions. Will headstrong, malodorous smear merchants ever brush away the cobwebs of absenteeism? Don't bet on it. While Actinoob is certainly entitled to ignore good advice from intelligent people, he would have us believe that he has his moral compass in tact. Yeah, right. And I also suppose that we'll be moved by some heartfelt words on the glories of insurrectionism? The fact of the matter is that we are at war. Don't think we're not just because you're not stepping over dead bodies in the streets. We're at war with Actinoob's choleric indiscretions. We're at war with his surly quips. And we're at war with his pushy adages. As in any war, we ought to be aware of the fact that Actinoob once had the audacity to tell me that his coterie is looking out for our best interests. My riposte was that if you don't think that he expects everyone else to cater to his every idiosyncratic whim, then you've missed the whole point of this letter.
Actinoob is too pharisaical to reason with. History offers innumerable examples for the truth of this assertion. I'm sure he wouldn't want me to eavesdrop on his secret conversations. So why does Actinoob want to advocate his homilies amid a hue and cry as dodgy as it is insensitive? A complete answer to that question would take more space than I can afford, so I'll have to give you a simplified answer. For starters, he thinks we want him to blame our societal problems on handy scapegoats. Excuse me, but maybe a large percentage of his secret agents can be termed refractory. The destruction of the Tower of Babel, be it a literal truth, an allegory, or a mere story based upon cultural archetypes, illustrates this truth plainly.
If you want to clear up these muddied waters with some reality, then tell everyone you know the truth, that I shall not argue that Actinoob's newsgroup postings are an authentic map of his plan to unleash an unparalleled wave of militarism. Read them and see for yourself. Our battle with Actinoob is a battle between spiritualism and larrikinism, between tradition and subversion, between the defenders of Western civilization and its enemies. With the battle lines drawn as such, it is abundantly clear that most people don't realize that Actinoob has already revealed his plans to implant within the government a set of fifth columnists who are devoted to his dream of denying the obvious. He revealed these plans in a manifesto bearing all of the hallmarks of having been written by a shallow pervert. Not only is his manifesto entirely lacking in logic, relentlessly subjective, and totally anecdotal, but every time Actinoob tells his helots that our only chance of saving the planet is to accept unending regulations and straightjacket "reforms" from his trained seals, their eyes roll into the backs of their heads as they become mindless receptacles of unsubstantiated information, which they accept without question. What I find frightening is that some academics actually believe Actinoob's line that a richly evocative description of a problem automatically implies the correct solution to that problem. In this case, "academics" refers to a stratum of the residual intelligentsia surviving the recession of its demotic base, not to those seekers of truth who understand that I want to make this clear so that those who do not understand deeper messages embedded within sarcastic irony—and you know who I'm referring to—can process my point.
Actinoob exhibits a startling lack of remorse, shame, and guilt for so brazenly attempting to destroy our youths' ability to relax, reflect, study, and meditate. It may be more correct, however, to say that Actinoob has been trying for some time to sell the public on a solecism-based government. His sales pitch proceeds both pragmatically and emotionally. The pragmatic argument: University professors must conform their theses and conclusions to Actinoob's moonstruck prejudices if they want to publish papers and advance their careers. The emotional argument: Everyone and everything discriminates against him—including the writing on the bathroom stalls. As you can see, neither argument is valid, which should indicate to you that if you looked up "scornful" in the dictionary, you'd probably see Actinoob's picture.
In all fairness, Actinoob has announced his intentions to construct gas chambers, incinerators, gulags, and concentration camps. While doing so may earn Actinoob a gold star from the mush-for-brains ruffianism crowd, he's obviously under the influence of LSD or some other hallucinogenic. Why else would Actinoob profess that the Earth is flat? He demands obeisance from his drones. Then, once they prove their loyalty, Actinoob forces them to pull the levers of boosterism and oil the gears of onanism. Not only have loopy, frowsy devotees of conspiracy theories of one sort or another decided to glorify their mottos by dressing them up as moral and righteous prerogatives, but their credos are being debated as though they were actually reasonable.
The practical struggle which now begins, sketched in broad outlines, takes the following course: Actinoob is capable of only two things, namely whining and underhanded tricks. I, not being one of the many barbaric foppotees of this world, have long been under the impression that his undertakings are uncalled for, but that's a story for another time. For now, I want to focus on the way that I've long thought it would be fun to try to explain to Actinoob how when one looks at this snippy parade of peremptory New Age bohemians, one instantly thinks of the word "thymolsulphonephthalein". For the most part, I'm just curious as to how deep Actinoob will have to dig into his profanity thesaurus to formulate a response. While the concept of broad-based peace and social justice coalitions remains desirable, he is more than merely whiney. He's ?ber-whiney. In fact, Actinoob is so whiney that the most believable explanation for many of the destructive trends in politics, economics, morality, and other key areas over the past two years is that a secretive, incredibly beer-guzzling, well-organized movement has been striving relentlessly to bad-mouth worthy causes. For the benefit of any doubting Thomases I will prove that point via an explanation of how Actinoob dreams of a time when he'll be free to incite pogroms, purges, and other mayhem. That's the way he's planned it, and that's the way it'll happen—not may happen but will happen—if we don't interfere, if we don't raise a stink about Actinoob and his deranged ideas.
Let's conduct a Gedankenexperiment. Suppose we could create a hypothetical population free of cuckoo nebbishes. Let's assume, furthermore, that Actinoob were powerless to reduce human beings and many other living organisms to engineered products and mere cogs in the social machine. In this hypothetical situation, wouldn't we all be free to challenge him to defend his contrivances or else to change them? Let's make this dream a reality. Let's get people to realize that we need to identify, challenge, defy, disrupt, and, finally, destroy the institutions that reconstitute society on the basis of arrested development and envious malevolence. Why? Because of what's at stake: literally everything.
Actinoob's reports are a spiritually destructive propaganda instrument aimed at our children. Be patient; I won't ask you to take that on faith. Rather, I'll provide irrefragable proof that Actinoob, already oppressive with his mealymouthed editorials, will perhaps be the ultimate exterminator of our human species—if separate species we be—for his reserve of unguessed horrors could never be borne by mortal brains if loosed upon the world. If you think that that's a frightening thought then consider that Actinoob keeps stating over and over again that ebola, AIDS, mad-cow disease, and the hantavirus were intentionally bioengineered by abusive simpletons for the purpose of population reduction. This drumbeat refrain is clearly not consistent with the facts on the ground—facts such as that Actinoob's accomplices have the gall to accuse me of laying the foundation for some serious mischief. Were these obscene swaggerers born without a self-awareness gene? Well, we all know the answer to that question, don't we? In case you don't, you should note that I want to let Actinoob know, in no uncertain terms, that it's pestiferous skinflints that make disgusting fascism possible. But first, let me pose an abstract question. Why can't he simply enjoy the fruits of his own labors and let other people enjoy the fruits of theirs? It is only when one has an answer to that question is it possible to make sense of his publicity stunts because his plans for the future are rife with contradictions and difficulties; they're absolutely tactless, meet no objective criteria, and are unsuited for a supposedly educated population. And as if that weren't enough, many people are convinced that I am asking the readers of this letter to be aware that he is a hypocrite who preaches morality and virtue while simultaneously muting the voice of anyone who dares to speak out against him. I can't comment on that, but I can say that by refusing to act, by refusing to find the common ground that enables others to warn the public against those virulent used-car salesmen whose positive accomplishments are always practically nil but whose conceit can scarcely be excelled, we are giving Actinoob the power to rewrite and reword much of humanity's formative works to favor exclusivism.
Actinoob has never gotten ahead because of his hard work or innovative ideas. Rather, all of Actinoob's successes are due to kickbacks, bribes, black market double-dealing, outright thuggery, and unsavory political intrigue. Despite some perceptions to the contrary, the pen is a powerful tool. Why don't we use that tool to advance a clear, credible, and effective vision for dealing with our present dilemma and its most amoral manifestations? Finding the best way to suggest the kind of politics and policies that are needed to restore good sense to this important debate is a challenging problem indeed. We must therefore tackle this problem with more determination, more tenacity, and more fanaticism than it has ever been tackled before. Only then will people realize that my only wonder is, What is it about our society that makes argumentative defalcators like Actinoob desire to propitiate subversive, vicious tatterdemalions for later eventualities? Any honest person who takes the time to think about that question will be forced to conclude that adversarialism has served as the justification for the butchering, torture, and enslavement of more people than any other "ism". That's why it's Actinoob's favorite; it makes it easy for him to spread lies, propaganda, and misinformation. Until we address this issue, we will never move beyond it.
IT'S A JOKE IF IT WASN'T OBVIOUS ENOUGH. Actinoob is mah fwend <3
http://www.pakin.org/complaint Complaint Generator
