- Joined
- Mar 16, 2008
- Messages
- 1,877
Apparently some have doubted the legitimacy of my claims of being a proper southern girl. I will not name names. That is unless you have jellybeans, I’ll tell just about any secret for a bag of jellybeans. Either way, I used to not be wise in the ways of a good Southern girl. I was a crazy redneck on the edge of society. I was the black sheep of my family. Here’s the proof:
After years of living on the edge, I got tired of planting my garden in an old toilet in the front yard and planning my weekends around Monster Truck rallies and Nascar races. So, I finally gave in to my family’s pleading and decided to turn my life around.
I worked really hard at being a prim and proper Southern Girl they could be proud of. I learned how to do things like:
-not eat in public
-glisten rather than sweat
-never leave the house without my “face” on
Someone with the Gulf Coast Debutante Society saw something promising in me. After much practice and a dramatic makeover I was ready to make my debut as part of the 1995 Coterie. Here I am on the eve I was finally presented to society (or as any good southerner would say it, “pre-zen-ed ta su-sigh-tee”):
I’d be more than happy to share any of my knowledge on proper pronunciations or just proper etiquette in certain situations since I am genuine and certified. They actually did give me papers... like a dog... but a very well groomed, good mannered dog that would be allowed to get on the couch and eat people food.
Either way, I certainly don't mind enlightening people. 
And for all you doubters, and you know who you are, IN YOUR FACE!
As you can see, not all of my charm school lessons took. I backslide a bit now and then:
You know what they say, “You can take a girl out of the country, but you can’t take the country out of the girl.”
*Guess which pic is really me.
*No wait, don't.
After years of living on the edge, I got tired of planting my garden in an old toilet in the front yard and planning my weekends around Monster Truck rallies and Nascar races. So, I finally gave in to my family’s pleading and decided to turn my life around.
I worked really hard at being a prim and proper Southern Girl they could be proud of. I learned how to do things like:
-not eat in public
-glisten rather than sweat
-never leave the house without my “face” on
Someone with the Gulf Coast Debutante Society saw something promising in me. After much practice and a dramatic makeover I was ready to make my debut as part of the 1995 Coterie. Here I am on the eve I was finally presented to society (or as any good southerner would say it, “pre-zen-ed ta su-sigh-tee”):
I’d be more than happy to share any of my knowledge on proper pronunciations or just proper etiquette in certain situations since I am genuine and certified. They actually did give me papers... like a dog... but a very well groomed, good mannered dog that would be allowed to get on the couch and eat people food.
Either way, I certainly don't mind enlightening people. And for all you doubters, and you know who you are, IN YOUR FACE!
As you can see, not all of my charm school lessons took. I backslide a bit now and then:
You know what they say, “You can take a girl out of the country, but you can’t take the country out of the girl.”
*Guess which pic is really me.
*No wait, don't.
