Playing as the Medic: three things you should know!

C

Captain Calle

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1. The Medic is THE most important member of your team, bar none. Scouts are completely useless, relying on your generous nature to survive more than a few seconds in a firefight. Pyros, demos, heavies and soldiers require your help constantly, probably because they're only played by the intellectually challenged. Snipers and spies don't do anything anyway.
You are the person behind every cap and every steal. Never let yourself forget it. Oh, sure, Valve weighted the scoring system against you, but don't worry; deep in their heart, that heavy who charged the last point knows it's actually you that won it for the team.

2. Everyone is only shooting you because they like you so much. As a relatively meek class, it's clear that your partner's only job is to keep you alive. Their only job, mind; no capping, no taking the intel, no kicking butt.
So, every time you die, it is somebody else's failure. Make sure you remind them of it.

3. Any time you uber is a good time to uber. You're sure to get people complaining though. "Too soon", they'll say when their incompetence prevents them from destroying the nearest sentry gun. "Too late", they'll say when they run around a blind corner into half the other team and you decide not to follow.
When you're met with such criticism, you have a few options. The poor medic laughs it off. The mediocre medic just keeps on playing. Let me educate you as to the technique of the AWESOME medic!
Have a pen and pad sitting beside your keyboard. Any time anyone (yes, anyone) criticises you, mark their name down. Put it in nice, bold lettering, so that you can see it at a glance.
And the next time that player is calling for a medic, the next time that player is on thirty health and burning rapidly away to zero, the next time they're looking directly at you and want nothing more than to be healed, the next time their screams of "MEDIC!" fill your chat window: that time, turn your back on them. Find the nearest scout or sniper, and heal them instead. And laugh while doing it!

I just found this old text document and thought it might be funny to post!

-Calle
 
lol i love it. its pretty much all true except for the demo men being intellectually challenged. i happen to only play demo and medic.
 
I don't know. Today we on gold rush we shut out the blu team at the 1st stage with 6 engies, 3 snipers, a few misc others and ZERO medics.
 
Endiment said...
[blockquote]this is the reason I prefer medpacks and dispensers.[/blockquote]
Heh! Another name written on my pad in bold letters! No healing for you anymore! Expect to get bonesaw'd and needeled to death the next time we'll meet.

-Calle
 
Calle....I play soldier. I for one am not intellectually challenged. I go up against 4 or 5 people at a time as the medic who was attached to me runs away. Congrats on playing medic, but they are just as you said....meek.
 
TheBigHerm said...
[blockquote]Calle....I play soldier.[/blockquote]
I know. You blew me into pieces ALOT.
[blockquote] I for one am not intellectually challenged.[/blockquote]
That's good to hear.
[blockquote]I go up against 4 or 5 people at a time as the medic who was attached to me runs away.[/blockquote]
We have to stay alive so we can get these übers you soldiers want all the time! And you kill yourself before they can kill you. What would have happened to the Medic if he went with you? Exactly, he would die and loose his über.
[blockquote]Congrats on playing medic,[/blockquote]
Thanks, 'preciate it.
[blockquote] but they are just as you said....meek.[/blockquote]
We can still kill our foes. ;)

(Just for your information. I did not write this text. I just found it on the interweb.)

-Calle
 
[quote1211663838=sykocus]
I don't know. Today we on gold rush we shut out the blu team at the 1st stage with 6 engies, 3 snipers, a few misc others and ZERO medics.
[/quote1211663838]

Haha I remember that, I remember saying "Ok guys lets try all melee this time"
 
LOL. I like having medics around, but this statment is pretty far off from being true. You should heal scouts, I don't care what ANYONE says. Scouts although may not seem like much if they have a decent player at the controls they can buy you quite a bit of time to work up those ubers. Granted some classes are easier to play then others that doesn't make the player incompitent. You should heal spies if they need it (granted you have time time to when not in a fire fight if you are stay with whomever your on) they protect you from the "useless snipers" that are waiting to rip your head off with a single bullet, just ask thatguy, he loves to see a medic working hard on that uber just to rip it away along with the fragments of skull and brain. They also get rid of the opposing teams uber charging medics that stop yours dead in its tracks. Also, your a support class, the time that you uber is only good when it SUPPORTS for your partner or prevents you from dying. And it's not my fault if you die. Crap happens sometimes. If I kill 5 people in our wake and number 6 gets you, too bad. The medics job is to heal anyone and everyone that needs it when they have a chance. Like I said if your on a heavy who is getting ripped by 4 people stick with him instead of healing the scout. If the heavy is standing there on the point not under fire and the scout comes up with 20 health HEAL HIM. He is part of the reason you and the heavy aren't under fire. Sorry, don't mean to rant but, if a team doesn't have a medic, it's not the end of the world. There are usually some med packs around to help out, but with no heavies I can't ever seem to find a spare chain gun, or a speed boost when there are no scouts around. Also, I would love to find a spare SG in one of those ammo boxes. :-) So yea, sorry again but, my point is that it is TEAM FORTRESS 2 emphasis on TEAM, and I understand you didn't write this calle, but it seems obvious the person who wrote it doesn't understand that properly.
 
Lol sorry, your probably right, however, I have played with medics before who seem to have this opinion on things.
 
Scouts are devastating in the hands of a skilled player, although they do have certain weaknesses... like tight corridors and a fully loaded soldier who is equally skilled.
 
Yeah, I was wondering why everone took it so seriously. I mean, the first may or may not apply in terms of "No grabbing the intel" etc. if you're in a sectioned map like warpath, and to try and preform such an objective will get you killed, if, and only if, you have a moderate amount of uber built up.
The last is obviously not useful at all. It's clearly tongue in cheek.
 
Great lines, very entertaining (thank you for that), however I partially agree with this. Absolutely it is a hard time winning a game without meds. Although in my opinion the scout is an excellent member of the team, and has it advantages over the rest, by merely able to make a quick run for a dropped "enemy" intel pack and bringing it home. Actually many times I have been beaten over the head while being a Heavy by a battering scout. Actually every single character on the team has its dis/advantages and well played as a whole can be a brute force to deal with. But yes, meds sometimes don't get the credit it deserves, by constantly healing others, and able to make a breakthrough in enemies defenses by throwing in an uber. But one member can not live w/o the other, and are equally important.

Again, I enjoyed reading your post

Thanks,


=(e)=™ MenOpaws



 
I dunno, Spies, Pyros, Engies, and Snipers are all pretty useful if they are smart. However most spies are mentally disabled "disguises as the guy next to them" type. And Snipers are too busy sniping other snipers. But I cannot accept the Medics being awesome due to the number of medics who uber me, let me run out into fire, then decide a scout would be a better person to uber.

Still, funny text document. :P
 
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