It doesn't matter the amount we take in if you're trying to base it of ours or your friend is.
It matters about the specific person.
If trying to lose weight just remain in a caloric deficit. Meaning you eat healthier foods at lower calories then your normal intake, and your metabolism will do the fat burning for you.
If you're trying to gain, you must go into a caloric surplus, which is eating more calories then you usually do. You want to avoid unhealthy calories like junkfood, because you want healthy calories in your body even to gain weight.