The TF2 Cookbook

Davincivirus

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Part 1 - Introducing the Sandvich (of course)

Ingredients in order of assembly​



2 Green stuffed olive with a tooth through the side of it in each half of Sandvich
1 slice of White bread (Wonder Bread works good)
Romaine Lettuce (1 Serving)
Roma Tomatoes (2 Slices/1 Serving)
Aged Swiss Cheese (3 Slices Cut into Triangles)
2 Slices Mystery Meat (We found this to be a meat with a hole, Bone in ham sliced horizontally, Subsititute would be mortedella or insert poor man's meat of some sort)
1 slice of White bread (Wonder Bread works good)
Compile ingredient into Sandvich like fashion and Cut diagonally. Enjoy those +120 nutritional points, don't forgot to make nom nom nom noises while eating.

Sandvich Chaser (21+ Drink)
Serve in a Lowball over Ice
5.0 cl (5 parts) Vodka
2.0 cl (2 parts) Coffee liqueur
3.0 cl (3 parts) Fresh cream​
This Concludes part 1 of the TF2 cookbook stay tuned for the next post: The Flamethrower!!!​
 
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The meat is balogna. And the 120+ nutritional points comes from the 120 pounds you gain when you eat it as often s a heavy does.
 
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Part 2 - The Flamethrower Wings

Ingredients​



1 Pound of chicken Wings
2oz. Tequila
1/4 cup Ketchup
1/2 cup Frank Red Hot Wing sauce
1/4 cup Worcestershire sauce
1 Pinch of Red Hot Chili Flakes
1 Lime
1/4 cup Vinegar
2 TBSP Tabasco
1/2 cup died Jalepenos cooked to soft
2-3 cloves Garlic
Mix in a plastic bag, salt and pepper.
Cook till the chicken is cooked of at least 165 degrees
"Who needs a backburner just open your mouth"



Burning Rainbow (21+ Drink)
Serve in a Martini glass, rimmed with sugar
Fill a Empty water Gallon with Vodka of any flavor or plain
Pour in a $1.59 bag of skittles not the very small one at the counter
Let sit in gallon jug for overnight+ and drain out the skittles afterwards
Rim the glass with sugar
Pour into the glass, light on fire (BE CAREFUL!) and blow out and let cool add a splash of lime if you like or any other skittles flavored fruit (cherry, grape, lime. lemon. orange) and enjoy
"You'll be on fire after this drink"
​
This Concludes part 2 of the TF2 cookbook stay tuned for the next post: The Sticky Bomb Meatballs!!!​
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The Stinky Bomb Meatballs

Part 3 - Introducing the Sticky Bomb Meatballs

Ingredients​



1 Big Jar of Grape Jelly
1 Jar Chili Sauce
Heat till smooth
1 Pound Ground Beef (85/15)
mix with salt and pepper and make mini meatballs and boil them till cooked
Pour sauce of drained meatballs and heat up
Serve over white rice to have one good meal.
Served well with the recipe below and its a very good party meatball.

Root Beer Float (Non-alcoholic)
Serve in a Chilled Glass
2 Cups Root Beer (Virgil's if you can find it)
2 Scoops Vanilla Bean Ice Cream (GOOD QUALITY)
1 TBSP Vanilla Extract
Insert straw and enjoy​
This Concludes part 3 of the TF2 cookbook stay tuned for the next post: Engineered Chicken Bowl​
 
Lol haha i cant stop laughing, time to make these while playing tf2. Actually im surprised nobody made the sandvich and posted a picture. :eek:
 
x

Lol haha i cant stop laughing, time to make these while playing tf2. Actually im surprised nobody made the sandvich and posted a picture. :eek:

I am working on that but... school + lazyness + using my roommates computer while mine is fix = no sandvich pic yet
 
Uber Charged Apfel-streudel


1 pound sweet apples -- peeled, cored and thinly sliced
1/4 cup golden raisins
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1 tablespoons white sugar
2 tablespoons brown sugar
2 slices brown bread, crumbled
1/2 (16 ounce) package phyllo dough
1/4 cup butter, melted
Optional: 3 Teaspoons of Dark Rum

DIRECTIONS

Preheat oven to 400 degrees F (200 degrees C).

In a bowl, combine apples, raisins, cinnamon, sugar and bread crumbs. Stir well.
Spread 8 sheets of pastry generously with melted butter and lay them on atop the other on a baking sheet. Spread the fruit mixture evenly over the top sheet, then roll the sheets up to form a log shape. Brush with melted butter again.

Bake in preheated oven 30 minutes, until pastry is golden brown and fruit is tender.

Serve with Vanilla custard or Ice cream and caramel sauce.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

German Black Forest the Cake is a Spy.
(Schwartzwaldekirschtorte)

For the Cake:
1/2 cup milk
2 teaspoons plus 2 tablespoons unsalted butter
8 large eggs
1 cup plus 2 tablespoons sugar
1 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
1/8 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
For the filling:
2 cups sugar
1 cup water
1 1/4 cups kirsch
2 (15-ounce) cans dark sweet pitted cherries in heavy syrup
2 tablespoons cornstarch

For the Frosting and Garnish:
1 pound confectioners' sugar
1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
1 stick butter, at room temperature
1 1/2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
1/3 cup boiling water
1 1/2 cups heavy cream
2 teaspoons sugar
3 ounces semisweet chocolate, shaved

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. In a small saucepan, warm the milk and 2 teaspoons of the butter together over medium-low heat. With an electric mixer fitted with a wire whip, beat the eggs and 1 cup of the sugar on medium-high speed in a large mixing bowl until the mixture is pale yellow, thick, and tripled in volume, about 8 minutes. With the mixer on low speed, beat in the warm milk mixture. Sift the flour, cocoa, baking powder, and salt into a small mixing bowl. Add half the flour mixture to the egg mixture and blend thoroughly until smooth. Repeat with the other half. Add the vanilla and mix gently. Grease 2 8" round pans with the remaining 2 tablespoons butter. Sprinkle evenly with the remaining 2 tablespoons sugar. Pour the cake batter into the pan, spreading it evenly. Bake until the cake springs back when touched, about 15 minutes. Cool for about 2 minutes, then gently flip it out onto a large sheet of parchment paper. Let cool completely.

For the filling: Combine the sugar and water in a small saucepan over medium heat. Bring to a boil, stirring to dissolve the sugar, and cook for 2 minutes. Remove from the heat and let cool completely. Stir in 1 cup of the kirsch and stir to mix.

In another saucepan over medium heat, bring the cherries to a boil in their syrup. In a small bowl, dissolve the cornstarch in the remaining 1/4 cup kirsch and add to the cherry mixture. Whisk until it thickens, about 2 minutes. Remove from the heat and cool completely.
Assemble the cake: Using a serrated knife, carefully cut each cake horizontally in half to make 4 layers. Brush the tops of all the layers with equal amounts of the sugar syrup. (You will not need all of the syrup.) Let the liquid soak into the layers for about 30 minutes. Place the bottom layer on a large cake plate. Spread 1 cup of the filling evenly over this layer, then top with a second layer of cake. Spread 1 cup of the filling evenly over it. Repeat the same process with the third layer and another cup of the filling. Top with the fourth layer.

To Finish: Sift together the confectioners' sugar and cocoa powder into a medium size bowl. Add the butter and mix with an electric mixer until incorporated. Add 1 teaspoon of the vanilla and the boiling water and mix until smooth. Let cool. Combine the cream, the remaining 1/2 teaspoon vanilla, and the sugar in a medium-size mixing bowl and, using an electric mixer, whip until soft peaks form. Ice the sides and top of the cake evenly with the chocolate frosting. Spoon the whipped cream over the top of the cake and sprinkle with the chocolate shavings. Slice and serve the cake.

Garnish with a butterfly knife (no not really)
 
hmmm... burning rainbow sounds nice
btw, for the hardcore, drink without putting out flame :D
(record yourself first then post it so we can all laugh at you on fire --make sure to yell "I'm on fiyaa" repeatedly--)
 
Bloody Orange Ubersaw Sorbet

Ingredients

2/3 cup sugar
1 cup water
8 large blood oranges
Juice of 1 lime


Place the sugar and water in a small saucepan and set over low heat. Stir until sugar dissolves and the syrup is clear. Remove from heat and let cool to room temperature.

Cut oranges in half and with a electric or hand juicer, remove juice from oranges. Place in a fine mesh sieve over a bowl and drain off juice, pressing lightly to remove juice. Discard pulp. You should have about 2 cups juice. Combine the juice, cooled sugar syrup and lime juice. Refrigerate until cold.

Freeze mixture in your ice cream machine according to manufacturer's instructions. Sorbet will be soft, but ready to eat. For a firmer sorbet, tranfer to a freezer-safe container and freeze at least two hours. If frozen overnight, place in refrigerator for about 30 minutes to 1 hour to soften.
 
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