I think we all know what ?STFU? means, but only if taken at face value. Now, Dr. Death has responded many times to me with this phrase, but never once did I assume he meant anything else by it. Perhaps Dr. Death is using it to abbreviate some other form of word, or perhaps its his opinion of the media, that they should leave people alone and actually start giving the news instead of what sells.
Now lets not over analyze this, but perhaps some reading between the lines is to be done. I?m sure our friendly neighborhood doctor has something else to say in his defense over the seemingly rude remarks. Maybe to shed some light on this grumpy man?s apparent lack of manners.
Dr. Death: I HATE PUPPIES!
Now again, I think it would be a premature assumption to just take this as it stands. I?m sure there is some deeper meaning. What he?s saying here, isn?t that he hates furry little animals that depend on you and eventually grow up to be your best friend. He?s saying he hates that this hyper-accelerated culture being pushed upon us is making us just like needy little quadrupeds. He hates how forced change is and the fact that it?s not happening naturally and how its ruining our next generation. Very insightful, doctor. I think it was rude of US here at EjeMag to assume you had no higher meaning.
Dr. Death: I like Steve Nash.
I think it might be safe to just assume he?s a fan of the Canadian basketball player here.
Dr. Death: You people really want to make me hit the bottle.
Now here, Dr. Death?s message is pretty clear. It?s a call for help, but not help for himself, help for everyone. He is bringing attention to the fact that so many people in current times just are afraid and embarrassed to seek out help when they really need it. I asked Dr. Death for some help with my math (how to take the inverse of an equation) and he helped me with out making me feel dumb or embarrassed at all. Unlike Oldie, who?s only comment was ?Eje, your stupid if you don?t know how to do that.? That?s the kind of thing we?re all afraid of. But if you ask for help and someone says that to you, then you can simply go to your local forums and write a fake magazine article and misquote him to make him look bad.
Now lets answer some of the requests and questions from our viewers.
This one is from a TwistedZ. He writes:
EjeMag, your so awesome. If I could marry your periodicals I would. Can I be a reporter for you?
Sure Twist, you can now lead the Completely Useless division of EjeMag.
This one is from Zadori. He writes:
EjeMag, I love your issues and your writers are amazing, but how come you keep referring to yourself as ?us? when its only one writer? P.S I LOVE EJE!
Well Zadori, EjeMag has lots of writers. Ones such as Eje007, and Eje007, and our poet Eje007. There?s also the editor Eje007 and the graphics designer Deathscythe. Our head of the Completely Useless Department is TwistedZs. Though we are unhappy to report that due to some downsizing of some completely useless departments, we have to fire most of our staff down to two people, Eje007 and Deathscythe.
This question, from Black cat asks:
EjeMag, could you, in all your greatness, tell me why Baron wins?
Sure thing Black cat. Baron wins because he reads EjeMag.
Ducttape writes to us, though we?re not sure what he means, so we paraphrased:
EjeMag, you?re the greatest. Have my babies. I like squirrels.
That about covers this episode. I?ve seen a lot of requests to interview council or Mostly Harmless, so I?ll see what I can do, I know they?re busy fellahs. See you all next Tuseday.
Now lets not over analyze this, but perhaps some reading between the lines is to be done. I?m sure our friendly neighborhood doctor has something else to say in his defense over the seemingly rude remarks. Maybe to shed some light on this grumpy man?s apparent lack of manners.
Dr. Death: I HATE PUPPIES!
Now again, I think it would be a premature assumption to just take this as it stands. I?m sure there is some deeper meaning. What he?s saying here, isn?t that he hates furry little animals that depend on you and eventually grow up to be your best friend. He?s saying he hates that this hyper-accelerated culture being pushed upon us is making us just like needy little quadrupeds. He hates how forced change is and the fact that it?s not happening naturally and how its ruining our next generation. Very insightful, doctor. I think it was rude of US here at EjeMag to assume you had no higher meaning.
Dr. Death: I like Steve Nash.
I think it might be safe to just assume he?s a fan of the Canadian basketball player here.
Dr. Death: You people really want to make me hit the bottle.
Now here, Dr. Death?s message is pretty clear. It?s a call for help, but not help for himself, help for everyone. He is bringing attention to the fact that so many people in current times just are afraid and embarrassed to seek out help when they really need it. I asked Dr. Death for some help with my math (how to take the inverse of an equation) and he helped me with out making me feel dumb or embarrassed at all. Unlike Oldie, who?s only comment was ?Eje, your stupid if you don?t know how to do that.? That?s the kind of thing we?re all afraid of. But if you ask for help and someone says that to you, then you can simply go to your local forums and write a fake magazine article and misquote him to make him look bad.
Now lets answer some of the requests and questions from our viewers.
This one is from a TwistedZ. He writes:
EjeMag, your so awesome. If I could marry your periodicals I would. Can I be a reporter for you?
Sure Twist, you can now lead the Completely Useless division of EjeMag.
This one is from Zadori. He writes:
EjeMag, I love your issues and your writers are amazing, but how come you keep referring to yourself as ?us? when its only one writer? P.S I LOVE EJE!
Well Zadori, EjeMag has lots of writers. Ones such as Eje007, and Eje007, and our poet Eje007. There?s also the editor Eje007 and the graphics designer Deathscythe. Our head of the Completely Useless Department is TwistedZs. Though we are unhappy to report that due to some downsizing of some completely useless departments, we have to fire most of our staff down to two people, Eje007 and Deathscythe.
This question, from Black cat asks:
EjeMag, could you, in all your greatness, tell me why Baron wins?
Sure thing Black cat. Baron wins because he reads EjeMag.
Ducttape writes to us, though we?re not sure what he means, so we paraphrased:
EjeMag, you?re the greatest. Have my babies. I like squirrels.
That about covers this episode. I?ve seen a lot of requests to interview council or Mostly Harmless, so I?ll see what I can do, I know they?re busy fellahs. See you all next Tuseday.
!
