Article ITT I attempt to review every movie I've seen.

So what other horror films have you not seen &/or reviewed? I will gladly help you split the list. Work wont get crazy til next month for sure...

I don't have so much a list this year. More of just pick and choosing. I have three more classic Universal films to get through; Bride of Frankenstein, Son of Frankenstein, and Dracula.

If you want, you could do:

The rest of the Friday the 13th Series
Texas Chainsaw
Hills Have Eyes
Halloween franchise/remakes...outside of the original.
 
Westworld_ver2.jpg


Title: Westworld
Year: 1973
Country of Origin: US
Director: Michael Crichton

Plot: Welcome to Delos, the world's most advanced and realistic adult theme park. We offer three distinct experience: become a night of the realms at Medievalworld. Or perhaps you might be more interested in enjoying the decadence of the height of the Roman Empire at Romeworld. Finally, live out you wild west fantasies at Westworld. There is something for everyone at Delos, please call today for the vacation of your dreams.

Review: What is with Michael Crichton and theme parks? With Jurassic Park it was genetic engineering and cloning. Here, with Westworld, it's artificial intelligence and robotics. I guess theme parks represent the ultimate frivolous applications for these technologies and shows man's cavalier attitude towards them and their development. I guess what I find interesting is that Crichton basically did the same plot twice. Maybe it's because Westworld didn't make that big of a pop-cultural impact. Honestly, outside of the new show, how many of you guys and gals have heard of Westworld, well outside of that one Simpsons episode. I mean we're talking about a film that deals with the dangers of AI 11 years prior to the release of The Terminator. It's not a bad movie either; sure it's dated as one would expect from a movie from the 70s, but it's still an entertaining film none-the-less.

Now that we have the HBO show...which is arguably a superior version of this story, the original will probably now be a curiosity. Something that fans of the show will check out to see what the original was all about. On its own though, Westworld is a decent enough film and one that if you're into 70s sci-fi is something to check out.

[7/10]
 
PiecesPoster.jpg


Title: Pieces
Year: 1982
Country of Origin: Italy, Spain, Puerto Rico
Director: Juan Piquer Sim?n

Plot: As the poster says, it's exactly what you think it is.

Review: This film has developed a cult following and it isn't because it is a well made or effective horror movie. No, Pieces is a broken mess of a movie and that is where you'll find most of the fun. Juan Piquer Sim?n has managed to create a rough approximation of what an American horror movie feels like, but either due to a lack of craft or cultural misunderstandings he misses the mark by a decent distance. The dialog, which is dubbed in English by the way, is...for a lack of a better word, terrible. Actually there is a better word, utterly inept...which is actually how I would describe everything else about this movie as well. Of course, that's half the fun though. If you're into cheesy bad horror films...then Pieces should be up your alley. Anyone looking for an actual effective horror movie though...look elsewhere.

[3/10]
 
ChildrenoftheCornPoster.jpg


Title: Children of the Corn
Year: 1984
Country of Origin: US
Director: Fritz Kiersch

Plot: The children of Gatlin, Nebraska murder every adult in the town because something in the corn told them to.

Review: Ok, I'm confused. How in the living hell did this film generate a franchise containing nine films with a tenth slated for production? Children of the Corn is not a good movie and from I can gleam, the sequels are worse. Everything about the film is predictable and obvious, which would be fine if the film was at the very least entertaining. But...it's not. In fact there is only one part of the film that is even slightly entertaining and here it is:

[ame]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pAVXjmZmEuE[/ame]

These 30 seconds are more memorable than the rest of the film...and for most people, it's not Children of the Corn that they know this from, it's this:

[ame]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z4RczR3fbZM[/ame]

That all I got for this one, I just can't wrap my head around why there is such a large following behind this one. Children of the Corn doesn't even fall into the 'so good it's bad' category of films. It's just competent enough to remain forgettable and unrelentingly dull.

[5/10]
 
bz2NWon.png


Title: The Alchemist Cookbook
Year: 2016
Country of Origin: US
Director: Joel Potrykus

Plot: A weird loner living in with his cat in a trailer in the woods attempts to summon a demon.

Review: I cannot help be feel that if this film was done slightly differently it would have be a great movie. The film's setting and plot are all geared towards a wonderfully atmospheric horror film about greed and egotism leading a young man to summon something that he truly doesn't understand. Instead the film skew towards an opaque approach to story telling and suggests heavily that our protagonist is suffering from a severe mental illness. The result is ultimately unsatisfying and renders the film a very dull watch. The Alchemist Cookbook is not without its merits though; Ty Hickson, who plays our protagonist, does a fantastic job with the material...in what is essentially a one man show. Same goes with Amari Cheatom, the only other character in the film, whose acting chops helps to create the only unnerving (and memorable) scene in the film. In the end, The Alchemist Cookbook is an interesting attempt, but one that would have benefited from a less abstruse approach.

[4/10]
 
Last edited:
Weiner_%28film%29.png


Title: Weiner
Year: 2016
Country of Origin: US
Director: Josh Kriegman & Elyse Steinberg

Plot: In 2013, disgraced congressman Anthony Weiner attempts to launch a massive comeback by running for Mayor of New York City...things do not go well.

Review: Oh hey, a review for a political documentary during one of the most contentious political seasons in recent US history...and of someone who's actions have recently sparked a major controversy in this current election. It's like I'm begging for a political based flame war. Meh, let's do it anyway.

Weiner charts Anthony Weiner's attempt to restart his political career two years after a sexting scandal forced him to resign from congress. What, on the onset, the film looks to be a gung-ho documentary about Weiner and his attempt at redemption, quickly shifts gears after a new sexting scandal comes to light. The result is a bizarrely intimate glimpse at a man whose life, both public and private, is in the process of total collapse. I say bizarre, because I honestly have no idea why Weiner gave the documentary crew so much access, especially in his private life. I would have imagined that after the new round of sexting allegations dropped mid-mayoral campaign that he would have rolled back their access. It's interesting, because the campaign itself becomes the backdrop of the dissolution of a marriage. We get to see the change in Huma Abidin from distant, yet supportive at the start of the campaign; to just angry, bitter, and cold by the end. The sad thing too is that Weiner looked like he was a decent politician for whom the sky was the limit...but he simply could not keep it in his pants.

Regardless on how you fall in the current election, Weiner is fascinating look into a man who has become a political pariah. It's worth your time to check it out.

[8/10]
 
11-14_%282003_film%29_poster.jpg


Title: 11:14
Year: 2003
Country of Origin: US
Director: Greg Marcks

Plot: Murder and mayhem befall a small town as five separate stories intersect at 11:14 PM.

Review: I have a list of films to watch, I've posted it a few times in this thread and recently I have made a concerted effort to start whittling it down from its 500+ peak. This list has been building for years and I honestly have no idea how a lot of films made it onto the list...there some weird crap on there. 11:14 has been sitting at the top of this list film quite sometime now...it's alphabetical. So I managed to track a copy down, not knowing exactly what to expect.

Fortunately 11:14 turned out to be quite good. The film is billed as a dark comedy on Wikipedia and that moniker is well earned. The plot is split into five chapters, each providing a different perspective on the events leading up to the film's titular time. Much of it is played humorously as each member of the film's cast unknowingly add to the chaotic events which culminate in two car accidents. Some of the film's humor is a little forced and obvious, but when everything hits its stride it ends up being pretty entertaining. The cast is made up of a combination of unknown actors and some familiar faces. All in all they do a decent job, though some of the performances feel...I actually don't know how to put this...indie? Anyway, the film is fun enough to recommend and it's one of those gems that seems to have been forgotten about. So, if you can track it down it's an all around entertaining black comedy.

[7.5/10]
 
Last edited:
Man I need to watch Weiner, my cousin was raving on how good it was. Been on a "kung fu" binge as of late tho and was wonder if you seen some of the classics, Drunken Master, Street Fighter (not the Van Dam one..), Riki Oh and the like?
 
Man I need to watch Weiner, my cousin was raving on how good it was. Been on a "kung fu" binge as of late tho and was wonder if you seen some of the classics, Drunken Master, Street Fighter (not the Van Dam one..), Riki Oh and the like?

Kung Fu is like the one genre that I never got into and it's not because I hate it or anything...just never got around to it. Like I just got around to seeing Enter the Dragon this year and that was my first Bruce Lee film. So, I need to see a lot more of them.
 
Oh, I guess I should also say something about what's going on with the thread and everything. I'm kind of losing interest in the whole reviewing movie thing. I mean I'll probably get back to soonish. In the mean time here are some films I've seen recently that are worth watching:

The Handmaiden
Arrival
Doctor Strange
Memories of a Murder
Wild Tales

Reviews to come...eventually
 
Have you managed to see Manchester by the Sea? I currently reside in the middle of nowhere south eastern united states so I haven't had the opportunity yet. It seems like it could be a big winner at the academy. I hear talk of Casey Affleck being in the running for best actor.
 
Have you managed to see Manchester by the Sea? I currently reside in the middle of nowhere south eastern united states so I haven't had the opportunity yet. It seems like it could be a big winner at the academy. I hear talk of Casey Affleck being in the running for best actor.

Still haven't gotten around to it and the way things are going right now, probably won't be seeing it until after it's out of theaters. Who would have guessed that the November/December film season would be so crowded this year.
 
Do you have a top 10 of 2016 for your movies that you've watched?
 
Do you have a top 10 of 2016 for your movies that you've watched?

Oh, yeah definitely. I was hoping to get a few more films under my belt before making a list, but I might as well get one out. So here is what I've meant to see, but didn't get the chance:

Elle
Nocturnal Animals
La La Land
Silence
Manchester By the Sea
Moonlight
Embrace of the Serpent
Train to Busan
Creepy
Toni Erdmann
Christine
Tower
Age of Shadows

Next post will have the list itself.
 
Last edited:
10. Zootopia

PGYy36U.jpg

I guess given Zootopia's pedigree, I shouldn't have been all surprised that it was solid. Still, who would have suspected that the house of mouse could crank out a decent noir-esque detective story? Mix in stellar animation, a fantastic voice cast, and a decent 'moral of the story'; you have yourself an all around winner and further proof that Disney's animation studio is 100% back.


9. The Nice Guys

eu83AyB.jpg

Boy, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang was an awesome movie. Just one of those all around solid throw backs to the buddy comedies of old, you know, like Lethal Weapon. Actually, fun fact Kiss Kiss Bang Bang was written and directed by the guy who wrote Lethal Weapon. Double fun fact...so was The Nice Guys, and Shane Black proves that he still have the ability to write an entertaining film. It not perfect, heck I have my fair share of problems with the film, but it's still solid enough to be here at number nine.


8. Swiss Army Man

4IIScHJ.jpg

I cannot tell you how many times I thought this film lost me when I first saw it. I was constantly going back and forth between "wow, I am really enjoying this" to "wait, am I actually enjoying this?" Some how though this film actually managed to stick its landing in a way that I was satisfied with the whole thing. Who would have thought that a film that picked up surprisingly apt moniker "the farting corps movie" at Cannes would have turned out well?


7. The Lobster

KQfjLU6.png

Christ, here is another weird one. Like I legitimately don't know what to write here. I guess the film is oddly funny and bleak and has something to say about the state of modern romance. It's also an original piece of work that is worth your time if you enjoy dower somewhat somber comedies.


6. The Witch

DMxglsM.jpg

Ok, so here is a prime example of my favorite kind of horror movie. Beautify shot, dripping with atmosphere, with a feeling of dread that weighs on your chest until you can no longer breath. It blows my damn mind that this was director Robert Eggers' debut film.


5. Green Room

LAfiq7G.jpg

This is Jeremy Saulnier to the excellent Blue Ruin and oh dear god is it awesome. The film pits a punk band and a gang of neo-nazis in a fight to the death after the punk band witness a murder. The film is brutal, but also perfectly constructed and incredibly well acted. If you have a strong stomach, check this one out.

- A few side notes for this point, first RIP Anton Yelchin who was absolutely amazing in Green Room...but also the last four films on this list were produced by a single film studio, A24.

This is literally a mark of quality now:

A24_alt.gif



4. The Handmaiden

5XbIdc7.jpg

After a brief stint in America, Park Chan-Wook is finally back in Korea and the world of cinema is better for it. For his return he has cranked out, what Wikipedia describes as a erotic psychological thriller and oh boy, does that description hit the mark. if you're into opulent cinematography, lesbian romance, and a healthy dosage of weird then The Handmaiden should be right for you.


3. Arrival

x85i1vW.jpg

Am I the only one who is amazed by the number of films that Denis Villeneuve is putting out? He is averaging a film a year at this point and shows not sign of stopping. He has freaking Bladerunner 2049 set to come out this year, Arrival last year, and my film of the year for 2015 Sicario. What the heck? Seriously, what the hell? Also, Arrival, it's a pretty damn good movie and one you should have probably already seen. If you haven't, then you're missing out on smart Sci-fi at its best.


2. The Wailing

EKJDWhB.jpg

Right now The Wailing is on Netflix, at least it is in the US, it's about 2 and half hours long...watch it. It's pretty awesome.


1. Hell or High Water

Q3fKeJn.jpg

This film is about two brothers who go on a crime spree for reasons unknown to us...at least at the beginning. This film was written by Taylor Sheridan who wrote Sicario and the film is add good as Sicario, which considering Sicario was my 2015 film of the year it's unsurprising that Hell or High Water is my film of the year for 2016. Ignore the bland title and the fact that it stars Chris Pine, it's an awesome movie and you need to check it out.

Ok, that was 2016, what were some of your favorites?
 
Hey, so I finally got around to setting up a Letterboxd account. It's a site that basically allows you to review films, rate films, create watch lists and all sorts of fun stuff. I've also started migrating some of my reviews over there after editing them a bit. This isn't me abandoning you guys, but just another way to follow what I'm doing:

https://letterboxd.com/pos3000/
 
Man I still need to see the Handmaiden... Just have not had the time to sit through such a long movie :P

But if I had to pick the best movie of 2016 it would have to of been Ghostbu... Man I can't do that with a straight face.

But thinking back the movie that stuck with me the most of 10 Cloverfield Lane. It has its problems like the final reveal and all (like The Arrival) but to me it was done at a better pacing.

Another pick would be the anime Your Name. I don't watch a lot of anime movies but I kept getting bugged to just go watch it and damn was it amazing. Not going to say to much but watch it if you even remotely like anime.

For the rest of my list of what I thought was good this year just look at Beasty, the only thing I would of changed would be The Nice Guys. Solid filmed movie but very lacking if that makes any sense.
 
Man I still need to see the Handmaiden... Just have not had the time to sit through such a long movie :P

But if I had to pick the best movie of 2016 it would have to of been Ghostbu... Man I can't do that with a straight face.

But thinking back the movie that stuck with me the most of 10 Cloverfield Lane. It has its problems like the final reveal and all (like The Arrival) but to me it was done at a better pacing.

Another pick would be the anime Your Name. I don't watch a lot of anime movies but I kept getting bugged to just go watch it and damn was it amazing. Not going to say to much but watch it if you even remotely like anime.

For the rest of my list of what I thought was good this year just look at Beasty, the only thing I would of changed would be The Nice Guys. Solid filmed movie but very lacking if that makes any sense.

Yeah, Korea was big last your with 2+ Hour long films. The Handmaiden, The Wailing, and The Age of Shadows...which I still need to see. Also, Still need to see 10 Cloverfield Land and Your Name. For Your Name, I haven't found a way to watch it yet, hopefully funimation releases it for the award season.

I agree with The Nice Guys, it was more or less to round out the top 10 list. I have since seen Elle though and that would have knocked The Nice Guys off the list.
 
Back
Top