Interesting Questions....And some fun,,for humor!

naniekso

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Mar 21, 2007
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*THESE ARE INTERESTING* AND some are true, while some we already know the awnser too***MOSTLY FOR HUMOR!!**



Mysteries of Life

1. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out"?

2. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns toast to a horrible crisp which no decent human being would ever eat?

3. Why is there a light in the fridge and not one in the freezer?

4. If Jimmy cracks corn and noone cares, why is there a song about him?

5. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

6. If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

7. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

8. Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

9. Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

10. What do you call male ballerinas?

11. Can blind people see their dreams?

12. Why ARE Trix only for kids?

13. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

14. Why is a person that handles your money called a 'Broker'?

15. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

16. If a man is talking in the forest, and no woman is there to hear him, is he still wrong?

17. Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over a billion stars in the universe, you believe them, but if there is a "wet paint" sign somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?

18. If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

19. Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?

20. Why do the alphabet song and "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" have the same tune?

21. Do illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?

22. Why do they call it an 'asteroid' when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a 'hemorrhoid' when it's inside your ass?

23. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

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Code:
IN ADDTION****

* Atheism is a non-prophet organization?
* Is the main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live?
* If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him...is he still wrong?
* If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
* Is there another word for synonym?
* Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all?"
* What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
* If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
* Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
* If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
* Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
* Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?
* Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
* What was the best thing before sliced bread?
* One nice thing about egotists: they don't talk about other people.
* Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
* How is it possible to have a civil war?
* If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too?
* If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry?
* If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
* Whose cruel idea was it for the word "Lisp" to have a "S" in it?
* Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?
* Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song? I know why the numbers are in this order but not the alphabet:-)
* If the "blackbox" flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole damn airplane made out of that stuff?
* If your parents didn't have children, are your chances good that you won't either.
 
[quote1194553931=naniekso]


I will answer your questions...

Mysteries of Life

1. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out"? Umm they saw that calves got nutrition from milk, plus women also feed their children through breast feeding. So some dude just put it together.

2. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns toast to a horrible crisp which no decent human being would ever eat? My dad actually prefers his toast burnt to a crisp. It's kind of a pain when we go out to eat breakfeast because he has to send his toast back like 3 times.

3. Why is there a light in the fridge and not one in the freezer? The filament in the light bulb has a hard time opreating at freezing temperatures. Plus has your freezer ever had that frost layer in it? Yeah the bulb would just get barried.

4. If Jimmy cracks corn and noone cares, why is there a song about him? There is actualy a lot more lyrics to the song. So it does have some point.
http://www.bussongs.com/songs/jimmy_crack_corn_blue_tail_fly.php

5. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane? I'm pretty sure they can. But ususally dont two people ride in the hearse to help unload the coffin?

6. If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat? If they just made a boat right away, they wouldnt have been able to stretch out 98 episodes and three seasons of the show.

7. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is? Because pointing to your crotch is found offensive in most cultures.

8. Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway? I dont have an OB-GYN, and neither do you, so this doesn't concern us.

9. Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
Pluto is a pet, and goofy is more of a companion. Why does goofy date a cow?

10. What do you call male ballerinas? Queers

11. Can blind people see their dreams? I have never met a blind person, but if I do, i will ask them.

12. Why ARE Trix only for kids? They aren't. I eat them on occasion and no one has ever stopped me from buying them.

13. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner? Would you watch a cartoon where a Coyote bought dinner?

14. Why is a person that handles your money called a 'Broker'? It stems from it Anglo-French root word "brocour"

15. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? Testicles

16. If a man is talking in the forest, and no woman is there to hear him, is he still wrong? Why would a man be talking in the forest? Is here there by himself? I think being wrong is the least of his problems.

17. Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over a billion stars in the universe, you believe them, but if there is a "wet paint" sign somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure? It's human nature to test things.

18. If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons? Morality comes from lame sitcoms on T.V. And most of those people are morons, so YES.

19. Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse? No there is also Disney Land and Chuck e Cheeses.

20. Why do the alphabet song and "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" have the same tune? Because they are kids songs and children are not that creative.

21. Do illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup? how do they even know they are eating alphabet soup? How do you get a full effect out of soup anyways?

22. Why do they call it an 'asteroid' when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a 'hemorrhoid' when it's inside your ass? I could answer that, but its gross...

23. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window? How many dogs are you blowing bro?

***
Code:
IN ADDTION****

* Atheism is a non-prophet organization? yes

* Is the main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live? awww yeah

* If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him...is he still wrong? Same question as before.

* If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation? no, it's considered psychopathic suicide

* Is there another word for synonym? No, i looked it up.

* Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all?" Depends on the ranger, but probably go home and drink a cold beer alone, i dont know.

* What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant? shoot it, then eat it.

* If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages? yes

* Would a fly without wings be called a walk? no it would be called crippled

* If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked? he's dead. so it doesnt matter

* Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?because their wool just gets wet and soggy, doesnt shrink.

* Can vegetarians eat animal crackers? yes

* Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny? not sure if i would ask a cannibal this question...

* What was the best thing before sliced bread? fire

* One nice thing about egotists: they don't talk about other people.Not a question, but OK.

* Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery? No

* How is it possible to have a civil war? A civil war is a war between citizens of the same country. When they don't agree, then it's a civil war.

* If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too? no, unless its part of the act

* If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry? not sure if antipasta is a word.

* If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? if your goal was to fail, then you have suceeded in failing. REMEMBER TRYING IS THE FIRST STEP TO FAILURE.

* Whose cruel idea was it for the word "Lisp" to have a "S" in it? Saying the world lisp mimics the noise associated with the speech impediment.

* Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them? Because a season is a time of year. and if it was OPEN tourist season, then by all means, shoot away!

* Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song? I know why the numbers are in this order but not the alphabet:-) The alphabet was created, then the song. So someone put them in that order because life needs order i guess.

* If the "blackbox" flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole damn airplane made out of that stuff? Because the black box is a solid recording device. If the entire plane was made of the same material, it would be too heavy, therefore, wouldn't fly.

* If your parents didn't have children, are your chances good that you won't either.Depends, sterility can happen to anyone. And that would mean i was adopted, which i'm not, so this question doesn't apply to me.

There you go! all question's answered.

[/quote1194553931]
 

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