Article ITT I attempt to review every movie I've seen.

Dr.Compton said:
You predicted the future, kinda.
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lol, I guess I kinda did. I'm actually surprised that Ryan Reynolds pushed for it as long as his did. He is pretty much the only reason why a Deadpool movie is happening.

I actually think this is my second prediction I made that came correct on this site.

I think the first time is when I accurately predicted The Last Airbender's initial average critical rating on Rotten Tomatoes like a half year before it came out or something like that.
 
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Sexy Beast said:
I think the first time is when I accurately predicted The Last Airbender's initial average critical rating on Rotten Tomatoes like a half year before it came out or something like that.
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That was kinda a gimme... I predict what ever the next M Night Shyamalan movie will have an average rating of 2 out of 5 or a 2.2 to be exact :P
 
ChocolateVillain said:
That was kinda a gimme... I predict what ever the next M Night Shyamalan movie will have an average rating of 2 out of 5 or a 2.2 to be exact :P
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Yeaaaaaah, after The Happening the writing was pretty much on the wall for Shymalan...of course that does raise the question of why Will Smith would pick him to direct his nepotism sci-fi movie.
 
Sexy Beast said:
Yeaaaaaah, after The Happening the writing was pretty much on the wall for Shymalan...of course that does raise the question of why Will Smith would pick him to direct his nepotism sci-fi movie.
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Yeah, I remember randomly seeing a Last AIrbender commercial right before watching After Earth, I had no clue why until I saw who the director was.
 
Looks like we're going to get at least 10 more Fast & Furious movies. Furious 7 just opened at $143,623,000. Which is roughly $46,000,000 more than it's predecessor. GG Vin Diesel...GG.
 
Bigger opening because of the Walker death/final movie. I can't see them moving past 3 more movies. Two movies with just about everyone from the original cast and the tenth movie with maybe two or even one old cast in the movie.
 
ChocolateVillain said:
Bigger opening because of the Walker death/final movie. I can't see them moving past 3 more movies. Two movies with just about everyone from the original cast and the tenth movie with maybe two or even one old cast in the movie.
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Logically, yeah...I mean how much can you squeeze out of a single franchise. Financially...they have zero reason to stop...like ever.

Look at their world wide grosses:

The Fast and the Furious: $207,283,925
2 Fast 2 Furious: $236,350,661
Tokyo Drift: $158,468,292
Fast and Furious: $363,164,265
Fast Five: $626,137,675
Fast & Furious 6: $788,679,850

The new movie is now on track to top a billion world wide during its run. Unless, we see a massive drop off in the next few movies...this series could easily go on indefinitely. Sure, they might not be with the current cast...but a reboot will fix that.
 
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Title: It Follows
Year: 2015
Country of Origin: US
Director: David Robert Mitchell

Plot: After having sex with her 'boyfriend', Jay contracts a sexually transmitted curse.

Review: It Follows is a smart, effect, and refreshingly timeless horror film...that is also not particularly scary. It's a classic Catch-22 of horror cinema, I like the movie for what it does, but it's hard to get around the fact that it isn't scary. Like it's a cool and clever movie featuring some creepy scenes, great acting, a wonderful synth fueled score, and an atmosphere bathed in dread...but that will only get you so far in the horror genre. It is a solid film though and one that I do recommend it if are game for a well done, but not particularly scary horror movie.

[8/10]
 
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Title: Into the Storm
Year: 2014
Country of Origin: US
Director: Steven Quale

Plot: This film follows the day in the life of the citizens of the perplexingly large town Silverton, Oklahoma...

Review: This is a 'B' movie about a a group of tornadoes that attack a town out in Oklanhoma. It's dumb...I don't even know if I should continue from that...or just leave it at: it's dumb. So let's just not write a review about this found-footage tornado slasher film and say we did. That is unless you want some substantive criticism about a film where the special effects felt more lively than the cast. Like they should have made the protagonists the tornadoes and the towns people like an evil corporation that is destroying the environment or something. Like mother nature is getting retribution on humanity for their hubris and wasteful ways. I guess overall it's an alright 'B' movie, kind of boring though. The only real issue that I take with the film is that at some point they use real disaster footage from like Joplin or somewhere...it comes off as way too exploitative for a film as pointlessly dumb as this one.

[4/10]
 
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Oh man I've been watching the hell out of Daredevil! D'Onofrio is reason alone to watch it. He is freaking amazing in it. The fight scene was a very nice touch I thought too that kinda reminded me of Oldboy hallway fight scene but from a different angle. The only thing is that was the only brave camera work they did in the show. It was early on in the series, but they have not taken any chances like that again so far with camera work which is very disappointing
 
ChocolateVillain said:
Oh man I've been watching the hell out of Daredevil! D'Onofrio is reason alone to watch it. He is freaking amazing in it. The fight scene was a very nice touch I thought too that kinda reminded me of Oldboy hallway fight scene but from a different angle. The only thing is that was the only brave camera work they did in the show. It was early on in the series, but they have not taken any chances like that again so far with camera work which is very disappointing
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True, though something like that takes a crap ton of planning and apparently it wasn't spliced together and was actually one continues shot. I did like that one scene in episode five where the Russans are going for some sort of pick up with the Chinese runner humming in the back seat. Most of that scene was a single take...though no where near as impressive as the scene in episode two.
 
It's that best time of the year again. Paper writing season. The bi-annual hell scape that I put myself through in the name of the never ending quest for knowledge.

So reviews are going to be spars...not that they haven't been already, but worse. So if you want to do a guest review now will be the optimal time.
 
Wag_The_Dog_Poster.jpg


Title: Wag the Dog
Year: 1997
Country of Origin: US
Director: Barry Levinson

Plot: "Why does the dog wag its tail? Because the dog is smarter than the tail. If the tail were smarter, it would wag the dog."

Review: Wag the Dog is about a spin doctor who enlists a Hollywood producer to help him create a fictional war in order to distract the news media from a sexual scandal that emerged just days before the presidential election. It's a smart political satire, but on that isn't all that funny. It is definitely a product of its time, pre war on terror, pre internet and as such it feels pretty dated. Though the underlying themes of the film are still relevant today, it features astroturfing, media manipulation, and all the wonderful things that the executive branch may or may not be involved in. It's just unfortunate that this film is no longer all that appealing of a package to present these themes. I think the worst of it is that this film is pretty dull, maybe I am just way too use to the stylings of Armando Iannucci. This film just lacks a certain punch that could bring it over the top...I mean the cynicism and sarcasm is there, but it lacks bite.

[6.5/10]
 
Oh, in other news, I have been reviewing movies on this thread for a little over a half a decade now. I honestly don't know whether to be proud or incredibly depressed by this fact.

Still, to commemorate this five year thing, here is an aptly titled David Bowie song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CLamhmCYwX4
 
Sexy Beast said:


Plot: This film follows the day in the life of the citizens of the perplexingly large town Silverton, Oklahoma...

Review: This is a 'B' movie about a a group of tornadoes that attack a town out in Oklanhoma. It's dumb...I don't even know if I should continue from that...or just leave it at: it's dumb. So let's just not write a review about this found-footage tornado slasher film and say we did. That is unless you want some substantive criticism about a film where the special effects felt more lively than the cast. Like they should have made the protagonists the tornadoes and the towns people like an evil corporation that is destroying the environment or something. Like mother nature is getting retribution on humanity for their hubris and wasteful ways. I guess overall it's an alright 'B' movie, kind of boring though. The only real issue that I take with the film is that at some point they use real disaster footage from like Joplin or somewhere...it comes off as way too exploitative for a film as pointlessly dumb as this one.

[4/10]​
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As a professional storm chaser myself, this film is hilarious, and insulting at the same time. Mainly for the usage of real footage from devastated towns like Joplin and Moore.

Not to mention the tornadoes width and whats inside the tornado to be completely impossible. For instance, it picking up the tank and hurling it up above the actual storm itself. Please.... for the love of all thats holy.. and in the "eye" of it... Jesus... I wanted to face palm so hard...

Currently, the largest tornado on record is 2.6 mile wide EF-5 tornado (I happened to chase and almost die in) back in May 31st, 2013, south of El Reno, Oklahoma.​
 
Aaron said:
As a professional storm chaser myself, this film is hilarious, and insulting at the same time. Mainly for the usage of real footage from devastated towns like Joplin and Moore.

Not to mention the tornadoes width and whats inside the tornado to be completely impossible. For instance, it picking up the tank and hurling it up above the actual storm itself. Please.... for the love of all thats holy.. and in the "eye" of it... Jesus... I wanted to face palm so hard...

Currently, the largest tornado on record is 2.6 mile wide EF-5 tornado (I happened to chase and almost die in) back in May 31st, 2013, south of El Reno, Oklahoma.
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My 10 year old self is super jealous right now. Like in what capacity do you chase? Are you with a research team or like a news team or something?
 
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Title: Basic Instinct
Year: 1992
Country of Origin: US/France
Director: Paul Verhoeven

Plot: A retired Rock n Roll star is found murdered in his bed. The lone suspect is an author who wrote a book where a retired Rock n Roll star was murdered in the same exact manner as the one who was found dead.

Review: Basic Instinct was a cultural touch stone of the early 90s. A massive steamy and erotic hit, that turned Sharon Stone into a household name. Even 20 years later, there is still a lot of fun to be had. The tone of the film is pure camp and cheese, though what else can you expect from the director who brought us works like Starship Troopers and Total Recall. Overall it's not really a great film, though it's not really trying to be one. If you're in the mood for an erotic thriller with the trappings of a neo-noir, then give this a shot. It's dumb campy fun.

[7/10]
 
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