A Tour of eGO Headquarters
So, some of you may have noticed that I wasn't around last weekend. Which isn't too different from most weekends really, but last weekend there was less partying and bar hopping and more traveling. Instead of hitting up the latest local bar to make the "Best pick up spots" list, I flew out to California for one of my cousin's engagement parties. But then, you all don't care about that. Instead you probably care about the rest of this story.
About a week before I flew out, I rang up JohnT and GardenGroveVW to let them know I'd be in the area. I thought we might just hit up the local Chili's for some margaritas and some cheese dip, so imagine my surprise when JohnT asked me if I'd like to tour eGO's California Headquarters! Of course I said yes.
I jotted down the address and planned to meet up with them on Saturday afternoon before my cousin's baby shower. Actually it was during her party, but my family is so used to me being late that they really didn't say anything when I showed up three hours after the party started. They were more interested in how I got to the party. More on that later.
So, Saturday afternoon rolled around and I woke up, took a shower, put on my eGO gear, and called a cab. Having never even seen a picture of eGO HQ, the anticipation was practically killing me. Or was that the heart burn?
As we approached the address, I was really taken aback. The eGO Headquarters really wasn't as impressive as I thought it'd be. I mean, it's still a really nice house and all, but I was kind of expecting a secret volcano layer or something.
Outside view of eGO HQ
Oh well. The cab pulled up into the driveway and some guy dressed in a tuxedo came out to open the door. I've seen pictures of JohnT and GardenGrove before, so I had no idea who this is. Turns out, he was their door man. Apparently all he does is open doors for the infamous JohnT and GG. What a sweet job!
Barry -- I have no idea if that was his name, but he looked like a Barry -- led me inside to where JohnT and GGVW were waiting. I have to say, the entrance way was only slightly more impressive than the exterior of the HQ. It could have used more gold, in my opinion. We'll need to get all of our members to donate more money next month...
Entrance to the eGO Headquarters
After a rousing round of handshakes, taunting, and general gamer speak, we got down to discussing eGO's latest plan to rule the world. Sure, I could divulge the information here, but I had to take an oath of secrecy. (Hint: we really do have a secret volcano layer!
) Eventually Barry came back around with a cart. Apparently, it's customary for any visiting eGO leaders to have a champagne toast. GG, knowing me as well as he does, made sure that I got the largest cup. And an extra bottle for myself. I got a picture of the cup, but there aren't many more pictures after this since the cup was so heavy that I needed two hands to hold on to it.
I got the largest chalice
At this point we continued on with the tour. JohnT showed me the sculpture garden, the rock garden, the zen garden, and the hanging garden. They were all pretty nice. I'm sorry I didn't get any pictures of them. I was too busy with my champagne. Eventually we made our way out to the eGO pool and lounged around, discussing video games while being fanned with palm fronds by the house staff. It made for a very relaxing afternoon.
Eventually, after we had all finished our champagne and developed a bit of a tan, GardenGrove popped the big question, "Hey RESPAWN, want to see the server room?" How could I say no to that!? JohnT pressed a button and Barry came out to open the door for us and lead us down to into the basement server room. I have to say, it's very refreshing not having to waste energy opening those doors for myself. Anyway, since I had finished my champagne by this point, I had both hands available to take a picture.
eGO Server Central
Now, what most people don't realize is that it doesn't take much of a computer to run a gaming server. That top one, for instance, is only a 386 with 4 MB of RAM! The rest of the servers run the gamut from non-MMX Pentium 1 processors to a Cyrix processor machine. I mean, it's a wonder we're not all just running our own servers at home!
Around the corner was the cage where JohnT keeps Dominion, Kendle, and agent86 locked up to maintain the servers. I tried to get a picture of the three of them, but agent86 kept displaying obscene gestures which wouldn't have been appropriate for posting on eGO's website. Sorry guys. You'll just have to guess what they look like, but they don't get our of the cage much, so you can probably make some guesses.
By this time I'm over two hours late for my cousin's graduation party, so I had to get going. Unfortunately, it was rush hour at that point -- isn't it always rush hour in SoCal -- so I was a little afraid that I wouldn't be able to make it before the end of the party. "Not a problem!" says Garden. "We'll take the eGO helicopter." Apparently, it had been fixed since the last time GG had wrecked it. The only problem was... well, I was a little scared of letting Grove fly since he had already wrecked it once. So, we settled into a best 2 out of 3 rock-paper-scissors tournament. Thankfully I had my RPS hammer in my back pocket. So, one hand of RPS and one broken hand later, Garden is handing the keys to the eGO helicopter over to me.
eGO Whirley Bird
It's a good thing I've been spending the last three weeks playing Flight Simulator. Otherwise, I may never have gotten us off the ground. (Getting back down to the ground is, apparently, the easy part when you fly like I do.) So, we all pile into the chopper and I fly us over to my cousin's shindig. I was sad to leave the eGO HQ, but sometimes you have to make sacrifices for family. Especially when you get to show everybody at the party how cool you are by crashing the party in a helicopter. Literally.
So, one broken hand, one slightly dented and scorched helicopter, and a lot of champagne later, I officially declared my visit to the eGO HQ a success. JohnT and GardenGroveVW are really friendly guys and if you're ever in SoCal, you should ring them up. Maybe you too can get a tour of the eGO Headquarters. Just, uh, watch out for Dominion in his cage. I hear he bites.
